Why you check your friends' away messages and what it means to be "in the circle"
By Dani Litt, Jayplay writer
"Be right back"
"At class, leave me a message"
"I'm out, call my cell"
At first, away messages functioned like a note on a storekeeper's door three or four words to tell visitors to wait or come back later. But among computer savvy college kids, they have become much more.
Today, students leave away messages to pass along their daily and weekly schedules, tell funny anecdotes and share favorite quotes from the latest books and movies.
"Production meeting, class, work, another meeting, rehearsal, back way later, peace"
"TYLENOL COLD...where have you been my entire life?"
"I'm in advertising, I don't lie, I sell."
-Picture Perfect
Experts say away messages have become a new form of communication and a new way to feel connected; we want to be in the loop.
"In some ways it's like gossiping," says David Jacobson, professor of anthropology at Brandeis University in Waltham, Mass. "When you are inside the circle, you know the gossip, but if you are excluded it is a statement about your social status."
Jill Kanterman, St. Louis,
Mo., sophomore,
uses away
me s-
"You know people are going to read them and you have to say something humorous," she says.
Away
is worse than when I
king. Then I am going HOME!
from the computer right now.
the computer right now.
Happy Birthday Lizzie!!!
When I am
IMs STOP IMing
from the computer right now
I say, I am away?
sages for entertainment.
Jeff Daniels, Overland Park sophomore, uses away messages to keep up with his friends.
"I check them to see where they are and what they are doing," he says. "And to see if there are any funny quotes."
In the know
"I hate spring break. Everyone signs offline and I am no longer continuously updated on my friends daily activities which I have grown so accustom to reading several times daily."
Of the 74 people on his buddy list, Daniels says about 55 of them would know he is playing the drums when he puts up a quote from the movie Drumline.
In one study done in Jacobson's "Virtual Communities" course, a student posted an away message and asked several people to read and interpret it. The message simply read, "sex." Jacobson says, "Guys who didn't know her looked at it and thought maybe she's interested. But women who knew her immediately said 'she's watching Sex and the City,' which is what she intended by the message."
People often have a lot of buddies on their list, but not all of them are close friends. Away messages can mean different things to different readers. Being able to understand an away message gives people a sense of belonging; it also shows they have a close relationship with the person who wrote it, says Jacobson. "It says something about where you are in the social circle."
Jacobson says if students read messages and don't understand them, they still won't feel included. "Away messages don't so much change people's social relationships, but they express inclusion and exclusion in a
"I check them to see where they are and what they are doing." Jeff Daniels, sophomore
different way," he says.
From the beginning
"Well, I updated my buddy list...I used to have 152 total buddies, now I'm down to 88...sad sad day...if you want to be on the list and u are afraid you might have been removed, please IM me and plead your case. Thanks"
Away messages have been part of the instant message package since the beginning.
In 1996, America Online introduced the instant messaging program for subscribers only. It became so popular that the company put AOL Instant Messenger on the Web for non-members in May 1997, says Krista Thomas, senior director for AOL corporate communications. AIM can be downloaded for free using any Internet server.
The program allows users to chat online using instant messages and to and to post an away message if the user is away from his computer. "It's like a social contract. You promise a presence by saying you are online," Thomas says. "If you're going to be on the list as a presence, you owe it to the person to say where you are or when you'll be back."
Shortly after the introduction of AIM, other companies, such as Yahoo! and MSN, began offering the same type of messaging. Today, AIM has more than 35 million active users, according to www.corp.col.com. The service is also available on cell phones through companies like Sprint, AT&T/Cingular and Verizon.
Thomas says the company has become aware of the popularity of away messages on college campuses through focus groups and market research. "People tell us they are leaving quotes from the book they are reading or their favorite movie," she says. "We hear a lot about college students leaving funny away messages."
The use of away messages has crept into the workplace too. Thomas uses them to keep in touch with journalists. She has 250 buddies on her buddy list, the maximum number allowed. Her favorite away message is by Ryan Nariane, a reporter for eWeek.com.
"Right now I'm having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before."
"What if the hokey pokey really IS what it's all about? Will we all have to
turn ourselves around?"
Employees in Thomas' office use away messages to say where they are, the best way to reach them and when they will be available. "If you are on deadline, you know that your away message will take care of people for awhile."
Making communication easier
"So far away I bet you can't find me!"
Daniels and Kanterman both agree that away messages are a good, quick way to communicate with others. "Think of how much you know about people through away messages that you wouldn't know otherwise," Kanterman says. "They bring us closer and keep us in touch at a time when not a lot of people want to pick up a phone."
But how many people do they really communicate with on a list that holds a maximum of 250 screen names?
Kanterman has 130 buddies on her list; she talks to only 10 percent of them. But she reads everyone's away messages. "I have a lot of people on my list from high school that I don't talk to anymore," she says. "But I learned where an old friend goes to college from reading her away message."
Not all students find away messages to be as exciting and informative. Some choose to stick to the phone.
"I get too stressed out," says Jessica Gerrick, Ft. Worth, Texas sophomore. "Too many random people IM you, and it just distracts from other things. I'd rather pick up a phone."
Jayplay 09.01.05
Selena Self, Norman, Neb., sophomore, used to use AIM in high school, but sticks to her cell phone now that she is in college. "I came to KU to get away from high school and meet new people. And IM for me is kind of a link back to high school," she says. "I wanted to sever that link from high school and be independent." Self says that away messages may make it easier to express yourself, but she sees a downside to using AIM. "You can't hear the voice and you never really know if their reaction to what you say is true or not."
Misinterpretation is something Jacobson's classes have studied as well. He suggests people take the conversation offline if what they have to say is personal and would cause problems if misunderstood. Away messages are meant for a specific audience, he says. "People aren't going to say things wildly outlandish because they could be held accountable whereas people in chat rooms say nasty things because they know
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