THE UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
THURSDAY, MARCH 28, 2013
PAGE 9A
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Facebook statuses lead to potential relationship stress
CAROLINE ATKINSON editor@kansan.com
Austin Pulse, a sophomore from Overland Park, logged into his Facebook, flooded with status updates on his newsfeed. One post read, "Don't play a game with a girl who can play them better! Yes I'm talking about you, fool with a winky face at the end." Pulse sighed and kept scrolling to "Thanks for the broken heart, RBD.<3.."
"I don't want to read all about your tragic love life," he said. "I feel bad for whoever the status is about because I'm sure people know who it is."
A recent study conducted by Juwon Lee, a Ph.D. student in psychology at the University, suggested that over-sharing on Facebook can have negative effects in a relationship.
"If you put something online, it's not really exclusive to your partner," Lee said. "It may cause your partner to feel less special or become jealous because other people are seeing it."
Lee said online and offline disclosures are different because people tend to reveal more online to a broad audience, while offline is usually face-to-face.
The study said that revealing more personal information online led to less satisfaction and intimacy for the other partner because he or she felt there was little privacy between them.
"It's interesting because, traditionally in social psychology, self-disclosure has been seen as the facilitator of relationships," Lee said, "so the more people tend to disclose to one another the closer they tend to feel."
"If I'm dating someone," Pulse said, "I want them to come to me personally and tell me why they're upset, instead of making an obvious post about it on the Internet for everyone to see."
Pulse agreed that relationships lose trust and exclusivity when one partner exposes too much information online.
Tess Hoerle, a junior from Eden Prairie, Minn., said she usually
sees relationship-revealing statuses when someone is in a fight or recently broken up with their partner.
"It is kind of funny to see their status say 'I love you so much, baby, forever and always', and then two days later it says 'I hate you so much! My life is ruined now... We're over!" Hoerle said.
Hoerle admitted that she has put up a passive-aggressive status to "grind someone's gears" before, but now understands it does everything but help a relationship.
Both Pulse and Hoerle recommended staying away from revealing too much information on Facebook, regardless of what it is about. They agreed that no problem can be better solved than through face-to-face communication.
"Facebook was almost like a gossip wall in high school," she said, "so it didn't really seem taboo to spill your guts to the whole world, even though it was only directed at one person."
— Edited by Megan Hinman
"it's hard for a monk to shave his own head," Lee said. The popular Korean proverb was fitting in acknowledging that it isn't easy knowing what to post and what not to post to the public, so she laid out a few guidelines for disclosing information on Facebook.
DO POST ABOUT POSITIVE THINGS
TIPS TO POST BY
"It can actually have a positive effect between you and your partner" because it shows you appreciate them. Posting things about something sweet your boyfriend or girlfriend did for you will make him or her feel like they make you happy.
DON'T TALK ABOUT YOURSELF ALL THE TIME
Being self-centered won't appeal to your boyfriend or girlfriend. "Your partner might feel excluded or forgotten if you don't mention him or her at all, Lee said. "It doesn't have to be something negative about your partner to have negative effects in your relationship." Make an effort to lower the amount of personal updates and put up more about your partner.
DO BE DISCREET
The more selective you are, the better. "If you're going to disclose information, make sure you're choosing what's appropriate to put up and what your partner may or may not like," Lee said. There are certain expectations in relationships, and exclusivity is important to keep a special bond with your loved one.
DON'T USE FACEBOOK AS A DIARY
"Disclosing information online can have really positive effects on yourself, but not necessarily on your relationship," Lee said. "Keep in mind that whatever you post may affect your relationship negatively."
FOOD
ERIN BREMER/KANSAN
Brellas' Crunchy Chicken Cheddar Wrap is in the running to win the Cooking Channel's college food bracket. The wrap defeated Syracuse University's Cosmos' Toasted Honey Bun and will continue on to the Elite 8. The winner is decided by online voting which begins today on the cooking channel website.
Campus staple gets TV time
HANNAH BARLING
hbarling@kansan.com
Brella's in the Underground at Wescoe Hall is notorious for its Crunchy Chicken Cheddar wrap. The wrap is so popular, it was chosen as the best college eat for the University in the Cooking Channel's Bracket Battle: Best College Eats.
The Cooking Channel's battle of the country's best college eats is an imitation of the NCAA March Madness tournament. They chose 32 dishes from colleges around the country and set them up against each other. There were three qualifications for the dishes: they had to be near the college campus, they had to be a staple for students and they had to be absolutely awesome.
The University's first opponent was Iowa State and its VEISHEA Cherry Pies. The Crunchy Chicken Cheddar wrap from Brellas' beat Iowa State's cherry pies by 353 votes. That victory advanced the University to the Sweet 16, facing Syracuse and its Cosmos' Toasted Honey Buns.
The Crunchy Chicken Cheddar wrap knocked out Syracuse's honey
buns by 920 votes, leading us to the Elite Eight of recipes.
Laura Windram, a junior from Eden Prairie, Minn., first tried the Crunchy Chicken Cheddar wrap her freshman year because her RA told her it was so good, she had to. She said that she wanted to keep getting them as soon as she tried it.
"It's a really interesting combination of food." Windram said.
For students who haven't tried the wrap before, it consists of chopped chicken tenders, cheddar and monterey jack cheese, sliced tomatoes, shredded lettuce and fat-free ranch, all wrapped up in a jaleeno cheddar tortilla.
Jason Gorman, a senior from Milwaukee, Wisc., tasted the Crunchy Chicken Cheddar wrap for the first time in 2010. He said even though it's not the healthiest choice, it's his go-to lunch because it tastes good and has a good combination of everything.
"The ingredients always seem pretty fresh," Gorman said, "and they serve it all over campus."
Our opponent in the Elite Eight is Marquette University. Our recipe faces Marquette's Real Chills' The
Marquette. It's a bowl of spaghetti topped with beef chili, chopped onions and piles of cheddar cheese and sour cream. Marquette beat Fordham University's Pugsley Pizza's Chicken Rolls by 4,511 votes in the Sweet 16.
To keep the University in the tournament, students can vote online on the Cooking Channel's website. The Crunchy Chicken Cheddar wrap currently has 683 votes, and Marquette has 649 votes. Polls are open now and will close March 31 at 2 p.m.
— Edited by Megan Hinman