Opinion THE UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
PAGE 9A
THURSDAY, APRIL 29, 2010
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--would post new links to "proof" that B. Hussein was born in Kenya. Just to fill in your mental image of this gentleman, I theorized from his profile picture that his biological composition was likely 76 percent spray-tan and 23 percent hair gel. His career was, "Yeah im a lawyer." (Note: Spelling errors still as seen on Facebook. Wonders of the interwebs, people.)
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--would post new links to "proof" that B. Hussein was born in Kenya. Just to fill in your mental image of this gentleman, I theorized from his profile picture that his biological composition was likely 76 percent spray-tan and 23 percent hair gel. His career was, "Yeah im a lawyer." (Note: Spelling errors still as seen on Facebook. Wonders of the interwebs, people.)
To all of my hallmates: Going to Taco Bell twice in one day and then to Five Guys isn't crazy. It's supremely satisfying
--would post new links to "proof" that B. Hussein was born in Kenya. Just to fill in your mental image of this gentleman, I theorized from his profile picture that his biological composition was likely 76 percent spray-tan and 23 percent hair gel. His career was, "Yeah im a lawyer." (Note: Spelling errors still as seen on Facebook. Wonders of the interwebs, people.)
Anybody about ready to get this party started in Club Schutz?
--would post new links to "proof" that B. Hussein was born in Kenya. Just to fill in your mental image of this gentleman, I theorized from his profile picture that his biological composition was likely 76 percent spray-tan and 23 percent hair gel. His career was, "Yeah im a lawyer." (Note: Spelling errors still as seen on Facebook. Wonders of the interwebs, people.)
My art history professor is jealous she's not artistic.
--would post new links to "proof" that B. Hussein was born in Kenya. Just to fill in your mental image of this gentleman, I theorized from his profile picture that his biological composition was likely 76 percent spray-tan and 23 percent hair gel. His career was, "Yeah im a lawyer." (Note: Spelling errors still as seen on Facebook. Wonders of the interwebs, people.)
I got hit with a chocolate water balloon on the way home from the library last night. FMl
OK, QVC. You normally sell useless crap, but 'smore makers? Really? I have never had any problems making s'mores on a plate.
--would post new links to "proof" that B. Hussein was born in Kenya. Just to fill in your mental image of this gentleman, I theorized from his profile picture that his biological composition was likely 76 percent spray-tan and 23 percent hair gel. His career was, "Yeah im a lawyer." (Note: Spelling errors still as seen on Facebook. Wonders of the interwebs, people.)
Heidi Pratt's new face rivals Michael Jackson's dead one.
I just ate my seventh hot dog of the day. I am the ultimate American
--would post new links to "proof" that B. Hussein was born in Kenya. Just to fill in your mental image of this gentleman, I theorized from his profile picture that his biological composition was likely 76 percent spray-tan and 23 percent hair gel. His career was, "Yeah im a lawyer." (Note: Spelling errors still as seen on Facebook. Wonders of the interwebs, people.)
Why does it feel so much better when someone else shampoos your hair?
--would post new links to "proof" that B. Hussein was born in Kenya. Just to fill in your mental image of this gentleman, I theorized from his profile picture that his biological composition was likely 76 percent spray-tan and 23 percent hair gel. His career was, "Yeah im a lawyer." (Note: Spelling errors still as seen on Facebook. Wonders of the interwebs, people.)
I spent $140 on a bridesmaid's dress, and the next day I found out that the bride de-friended me on Facebook!
--would post new links to "proof" that B. Hussein was born in Kenya. Just to fill in your mental image of this gentleman, I theorized from his profile picture that his biological composition was likely 76 percent spray-tan and 23 percent hair gel. His career was, "Yeah im a lawyer." (Note: Spelling errors still as seen on Facebook. Wonders of the interwebs, people.)
--would post new links to "proof" that B. Hussein was born in Kenya. Just to fill in your mental image of this gentleman, I theorized from his profile picture that his biological composition was likely 76 percent spray-tan and 23 percent hair gel. His career was, "Yeah im a lawyer." (Note: Spelling errors still as seen on Facebook. Wonders of the interwebs, people.)
I'm still grossed out thinking about how you slept with him. And him. And that other guy.
I've discovered a novel solution for both insomnia and habitual 10 a.m. class tardiness: Two shots of black rum before bed.
--would post new links to "proof" that B. Hussein was born in Kenya. Just to fill in your mental image of this gentleman, I theorized from his profile picture that his biological composition was likely 76 percent spray-tan and 23 percent hair gel. His career was, "Yeah im a lawyer." (Note: Spelling errors still as seen on Facebook. Wonders of the interwebs, people.)
--would post new links to "proof" that B. Hussein was born in Kenya. Just to fill in your mental image of this gentleman, I theorized from his profile picture that his biological composition was likely 76 percent spray-tan and 23 percent hair gel. His career was, "Yeah im a lawyer." (Note: Spelling errors still as seen on Facebook. Wonders of the interwebs, people.)
Today, my discussion-section GTA fell asleep in the main lecture. If that's not a sign, I don't know what is.
My grandmothers, who live on opposite sides of the country, sent me the same birthday card on the same day Coincidence?
--would post new links to "proof" that B. Hussein was born in Kenya. Just to fill in your mental image of this gentleman, I theorized from his profile picture that his biological composition was likely 76 percent spray-tan and 23 percent hair gel. His career was, "Yeah im a lawyer." (Note: Spelling errors still as seen on Facebook. Wonders of the interwebs, people.)
Next week on "The Blonde,
The Orange and the Slutty,
Steph loans Anna her Bump-it,
but Anna doesn't give it back!
--would post new links to "proof" that B. Hussein was born in Kenya. Just to fill in your mental image of this gentleman, I theorized from his profile picture that his biological composition was likely 76 percent spray-tan and 23 percent hair gel. His career was, "Yeah im a lawyer." (Note: Spelling errors still as seen on Facebook. Wonders of the interwebs, people.)
I wonder if Pangaea had breakup sex. I bet it would have been earth shattering.
--would post new links to "proof" that B. Hussein was born in Kenya. Just to fill in your mental image of this gentleman, I theorized from his profile picture that his biological composition was likely 76 percent spray-tan and 23 percent hair gel. His career was, "Yeah im a lawyer." (Note: Spelling errors still as seen on Facebook. Wonders of the interwebs, people.)
If a student ever came to my office crying in hopes of getting an extension or excused absence, I'd laugh.
--would post new links to "proof" that B. Hussein was born in Kenya. Just to fill in your mental image of this gentleman, I theorized from his profile picture that his biological composition was likely 76 percent spray-tan and 23 percent hair gel. His career was, "Yeah im a lawyer." (Note: Spelling errors still as seen on Facebook. Wonders of the interwebs, people.)
I'm always worried the guy next to me on the bus is going to hear the Taylor Swift song blasting from my iPod.
--would post new links to "proof" that B. Hussein was born in Kenya. Just to fill in your mental image of this gentleman, I theorized from his profile picture that his biological composition was likely 76 percent spray-tan and 23 percent hair gel. His career was, "Yeah im a lawyer." (Note: Spelling errors still as seen on Facebook. Wonders of the interwebs, people.)
S'mores are the best dorm food.
HUMOR
Ignorance spewed on the Internet best combatted with use of parody
I usually avoid politics. I mean, I'm from a small town in Kansas where, if I mention the name "Barack Obama," the most common reply is, "You mean B. HUSSEIN Obama?"
Instead, I leave the politics to the people who know the stuff, such as The Kansan's designated political columnists or South Park.
However, I came across a page on Facebook recently with nearly one million people. The title of the group is "Dear Lord, this year you took my favorite actor, Patrick Swaycey. You took my favorite actress, Farah Fawcett. You took my favorite singer, Michael Jackson. I just wanted to let you know my favorite president is Barack Obama. Amen." (Note: Spelling errors as seen in the actual title — in case you want to track the group down for yourself.)
As I clicked on the group page, I was greeted by a slew of middle-aged, sweater-wearing women and people my age with Confederate flags for profile pictures. Among these people, the common chant seemed to be "Buy American. Obama's gonna make us all go broke. Don't forget, God, my favorite speaker of the house is Nancy Pelosi."
It was as if I was walking into a nightmare where the parodies of these people — with the pictures of eagles and poor grammatical skills — had come to life.
Among the members of the group was a middle-aged lawyer who
BY CHANCE CARMICHAEL
As mentioned, this man was just one among many of a raging, united and, I assume, interrelated group. Scanning through the group, I became very weary for our world. Yes, I was upset by the lies circulating about Obama's policies. But, even more distressing was the admission that "Patrick Swayzie" was their favorite actor. How safe can I feel in a country where one million voting citizens have are so totally ignorant as to say such a thing?
I thought our country was doomed. No, not Chuckie Finster "doomed," but really, truly doomed. I flash forwarded to an ugly 2012, where the world, overrun by stupidity and ignorance, was handed over
to the control of people such as Tyra Banks or Sarah Palin. You betcha I was afraid.
Then, through the bleak darkness, I saw a light. I now refer to this angel of goodness as "Cattace Meowmers" because the profile picture was of a cat. In its posts, the cat did everything from inviting others to smoke weed to quoting promotions of atheism to attempting to disprove Christianity.
The cat was not alone, though. Many humans had joined — including myself — to argue with these insane people banding together to wish death upon the president. The page had become a gross Internet forum where people used sarcasm to parody those so intolerant of our president.
Ironically, it was because of the cat account that I regained faith in America. The people were smart, had senses of humor and were willing to mock the one million idiots in the "Szwycie/Farah" group.
Then I began to wonder: How many of the one million were rebels, patrolling Facebook to combat ignorance, like "Catface Meowmers" and me?
I can only hope it's as many people as those who use eagles in front of Confederate flags as their Facebook profile pictures.
Carmichael is a sophomore from Mulvane in journalism and film and media studies.
CHATTERBOX... Responses to the news of the week on Kansan.com
"Students overwhelmingly decided to put Smith/Ritter on the exec. staff, and not Ringer/Cantwell. Smith should put together a staff of the best people possible so that he can get as much done as possible."
— "jiingleheimerschmidt" in response to the column, "Landslide may not be so representative after all" on April 23.
"The American people have shown us that when a war is sufficiently justified to enough people, a volunteer military will suffice. The ideal would be to ensure that we fight wars only with volunteer forces. If there aren't enough volunteer forces, perhaps the nature of the war needs to be questioned."
- "Ebenavid" in response to "Letter to the Editor: No pride in draft dodging" on April 22.
"The reason that Fake Patty's Day is so successful is because it mocks a holiday that happens to be one of everyone's favorite holidays to party, St. Patty's Day. A luau is more of a theme for a night house party, not an all-day event in a college town."
— "Justathought" in response to "Larryville Luau sees small turnout" on April 26.
GUEST EDITORIAL
Importing students' grades harms educational process
particular has recently raised eyebrows: the delegation of paper-grading at some colleges to companies that work in India and Malaysia. This particularly worrisome trend received media attention when the practice was adopted in a University of Houston class. It brings up concerns about the quality of contact students are receiving in large classes
O f all of the changes to American society because of outsourcing one in par-
In this particular case, a company called EduMentry that hires workers in India, Malaysia and Singapore, provided a service called Virtual TA, which grades papers for large classes that lack enough teaching assistants.
Outsourcing in this manner takes away from the education students are receiving, as there is considerable value in having teaching assistants who experience the class and then evaluate students accordingly.
Furthermore, outsourced grading strictly limits the range and scope of the papers being considered. Companies that grade papers likely rely on outlines from professors, listing points that should be covered in the assignment. Papers should be graded with a holistic view to encourage a diversity of ideas that simply cannot be expressed when attempting to follow a fixed outline.
This allows the graders to take into account dynamics in the course that otherwise would be missed by
an international firm.
Additionally, it is worthwhile for students to have an opportunity to communicate directly with the people who are evaluating their work.
Although office hours with a teaching assistant would be ideal, given the understandable constraints of tight budgets, even having the option to e-mail evaluators with questions is worthwhile and preferable to a complete lack of contact. Although large classes are often the norm at some universities, schools should never overextend enrollment of classes to the point where they do not have the adequate resources to accommodate all of the students.
In addition to the general concerns about this trend in outsourcing, we have further doubts about the specific firm used by the University of Houston professor in question.
While the company, based in Virginia, asserts that all of its "assessors," or graders, hold master's degrees and must pass written exams before they are employed, it refused to give specific information on the graders' educational backgrounds.
The firm insists that "the proof is in the pudding" when it comes to the success of their assessors. Yet this lack of transparency is troubling, especially considering the already anonymous and impersonal nature of such outsourcing.
If firms such as this are interested in working with American universities on tasks as crucial as grading student work, they should be more forthcoming about the qualifications of their employees.
— UWire.com, Harvard Crimson at Harvard University.
LGBT ISSUES
Accepting the'B'in'LGBT'
For those of you familiar with the first episode of Showtimes' hit drama "The L. Word," you probably recall the quote, "God, Alice, when are you going to make up your mind between dick and pussy? And spare us the gory bisexual details?"
This came from the lesbian character, Dana, as she ribbed her bisexual best friend, Alice, who was talking about the sexual stylings of a man she had bedded.
Dana's comment shows the stigma often associated with the 'BX' or Biseuxals, of the LGBT community.
Watt, what? Even though bisexuals are considered a part of the gay community, they suffer constant judgment from the outside as well as within.
Bisexuals are greedy. They're promiscuous. They're twice as likely to cheat on someone because both sexes are there for the taking. Bisexuals aren't gay enough nor are they straight enough. . .
Queerly Speaking
This is a mindset that both the homosexual and heterosexual communities share when it comes to bisexuality.
On April 20, The Seattle Times published an article about three bisexual men suing the North American Gay Amateur Athletic Alliance claiming they were discriminated against during the 2008 Gay World Softball series. This came after a competing team accused the men's team of violating the alliance rule stating, "each World Series team can have no more than two heterosexual players."
The three players were called into a conference room of more than 25 people and asked "personal and intrusive questions" about their sexual attractions and desires to determine their sexual orientation. Ultimately, the three men were ruled "non-gay," and their team was stripped of its second-place finish. With it also came a recommendation that the three men be suspended for a year.
There is still a lot of discrimination toward the LGBT community, and we have a long way yet to go. What saddens me about the incident involving the bisexual men is
BY LAUREN BORNSTEIN
that the discrimination came from within the gay community. When we target our own people, saying they are "not gay enough" to belong to a gay organization, when we limit the number of people who can participate in an event because they are too gay, too in the middle, or too straight, we only hinder ourselves from achieving further equality.
I understand that any private organization can make up its membership terms, but why is it only after people are successful that they suddenly find themselves under attack for who they are?
A rival team accuses another team of not being gay enough after that team nearly wins the Gay Softball World Series, as if sexual orientation determines a person's athleticism. Yeah, and skin color determines intelligence. And an Ivy League degree makes for the best presidents. And height determines personality. Because we know how correct those statements are.
We have to stop hating each other. Gay rights don't mean solely gays and lesbians. They include everyone in between. They include gender identity and transsexuality. Without the B and T in LGBT, our community becomes a lot smaller, and we lose a lot of strength. We can't afford to lose each other. Our strength is in our ability to let in and love everyone for who they are. So please, stop the hating against bisexuals. Let's stop the hating and increase the loving.
After all, how can we ever get respect from outside the LGBT community if we can't even respect our own?
Bornstein is a senior from Lawrence in women's studies.
Socialist systems support citizens
LETTER TO THE EDITOR
The Kansan has recently published a number of letters and editorials on the topic of socialism. A theme runs through all the letters: Socialism is about redistributing wealth. Whether socialism works is not my concern here. What socialism is about, at least here in the United States, is.
Programs and policies such as welfare, food stamps and progressive taxes are labeled as socialist. Whether they are being attacked for sapping diligence, being unAmerican or favoring the state over the individual, or are being supported because they give people a chance or give equal opportunity, the real reason for these policies is entirely overlooked.
Our progressive policies are about justice. In a society that is about respecting the rule of law, injury is compensated by those who caused the injury. Every citizen who could not go to college because their parents were paid too low wages has been injured.
Every employee who adopted the idea that his company was his family only to be fired and his job outsourced has been injured. Every worker who became too sick to work and lost their job has been injured. For these reasons and many others, livelihoods have been ruined and children's potential quashed.
Our society and lifestyle is entirely based on the poor being abused, overworked and treated inhumanly. It may not have been direct, but our comfort derives from debasement of those unable to defend themselves because of past maltreatment or bad luck.
This is not an attack on capitalism. Rather it is a frank description of the world in which we live. These policies are not products of socialism. They are products of America's commitment to justice. A sense of justice forces us to pay when we break something. Why does this not apply to people?
Patrick Totaro is a senior from New York City.
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THE EDITORIAL BOARD
THE EDITORIAL BOARD
MEMBERS of the Kansian Editorial Board are Stephen Montermayor, Brianna Pennestellen,
Stephen Meyer, Cunningham, Wicky Lu, Emily McCoy, Katie Kearney, Stefanie Penne,
James Castle, Michael Holtz, Callin Thurburgh and Andrew Hammond.