Share your opinions Contact Donovan Atkinson or Matt Rodriguez at 864-4810 or editor@kansan.com OPINION Wednesday, July 28, 2004 THE UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN—WEEKLY SUMMER EDITION 6 www.kansan.com STINSON'S VIEW Zach Stinson/Kansan TALK TO US The Kansan welcomes letters to the editors and guest columns submitted by students, faculty and alumni. The Kansan reserves the right to edit, cut to length, or reject all submissions. Letters to the editor should be no longer than 200 words and guest columns should not exceed 650 words. To submit a letter to the editor or a column, e-mail the document to opinion@kansan.com with your name, hometown, year in school or position and phone number. For any questions, call Donovan Atkinson at 864-4810 or e-mail at opinion@kansan.com. General questions should be directed to the editor at editor@kansan.com. GUEST COLUMN GUIDELINES Maximum Length: 650 word limit Include: Author's name Class, hometown (student) Position (faculty member) Also: The Kansan will not print guest columns that attack another columnist. LETTER GUIDELINES Maximum Length: 200 word limit Include: Author's name and telephone number Class, hometown (student) Position (faculty member) SUBMIT TO E-mail: opinion@kansan.com Hard copy: Kansan newsroom 111 Stauffer-Flint Sequels represent lack of creativity in Hollywood "I got a Bedazzler so my outfit's tight."—Ad Rock, Beastie Boys, from the 2004 album. To the 5 Burroughs. As I finish my trilogy of opinion columns this summer, I've decided to focus on the movie sequel. The summermovie staple grows increasingly stale year after year. But the sequel doesn't always make us yearn for the original; occasionally it's actually better than the first. perspective Chris Crawford opinion@kansan.com This summer's sequels that didn't suck included Spider-Man 2, Shrek 2 and Harry Potter and The Prisoner of Azkaban. But these movies are the exception. Usually, even if they're bad, they still make money. But what if we used those In contrast, I'd argue that we could do without Princess Diaries 2: The Royal Engagement or The Chronicles of Riddick. I understand that sequels seem like sure bets to Hollywood executives. slots for new creative projects that otherwise would never see the light of day? Maybe we'd get to see the next Godfather, Shawshank Redemption or Rushmore. Because I have no say in the matter, and neither do you, maybe I could pitch some sequels that America might actually like to see. First, to you Mr. M. Night Shyamalan, I like your movies: The Sixth Sense, Unbreakable and Signs. I understand that once again you will scare us with the unknown in your upcoming film, The Village. How about calling your next project Sock, Er...Mom! It would follow a lovable, every-day family's life until something out of the ordinary begins to happen. Their socks begin to disappear. Not just one here or there, but lots of socks. One day, while playing in the backyard, the children discover a door in an oak tree. Inside they find hundreds of sock monkeys that are building more of their kind. One of the children yells out the titular line, "That's my sock, er...mom!" The family must fight the sock monkeys to save their house and potentially the human race. Second, due to the popularity of the "dance battle" film, You Got Served, earlier this year I suggest a sequel of equal intensity and competition. You Got Soft-Served features a ragtag gang of ice cream parlor employees known as the "Scoop Doctors" that must challenge the well-polished, cross-town rivals, "Mad Cow Dairy_Delights," to save their shop. The ice cream "battle" culminates at the citywide "Cone Or Go Home" competition. Last, I propose the prequel to a great film, Fight Club. How could you top a script like Fight Club? How about taking Tyler Durden back to high school, where the incessant teasing about his incredible math skills drives him to start the Math Club without the school's permission. Durden's rise as an unmatched "mathlete" spawns underground math clubs across the country. I hope my ridiculous sarcasm reinforces the fact that Hollywood will continue to make unoriginal, unwatchable projects as long as you continue to go see them. Crawford is an Overland Park senior in journalism.