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University Daily Kansan
Monday, May 11, 1964
Would-be Friends:
Big Favor
If one had friends like those of Mike Mount, he would need no enemies.
One fellow was so concerned about Mount, the second semester senior suspended by the Disciplinary Committee, that he called Dean Donald K. Alderson to tell him a bomb was going off in his house Thursday night. "If the hanging didn't get you at ten, then the bomb will get you at two." The final stroke of idiocy.
Mount had 20 or 30 would-be friends—or joy-seekers—who turned out Thursday night to the effigy hanging of Dean Alderson, who chairs the Disciplinary Board. They attached Mount's name to some good publicity.
A friend in need is a friend indeed. Indeed. If those who think that Mount was done an injustice really wanted to do something they could have done almost anything except tuck their heads under their arms and strike out in blind malice.
The publicity which the affair has received has almost muddled the real issue—whether the Committee suspension of Mount three weeks before graduation was justified.
Of course, there is no way to tell because of the secrecy which clouds in the mind of the student body the function of the Committee. The papers cannot report the meetings of the Committee, and the real facts can never be known or, at least, the facts on which the decisions are based.
The ASC could learn from the recent hysteria. Number one, by publishing the facts of the cases and the decisions made students would know in a general sense what to expect from the Committee. At the same time, the Committee—if it acts justly—could avoid mass invalid criticism.
The malice of the hanging and capricious threat directed toward Dean Alderson, the Committee's embodiment (at least in the students' mind, even though the students outnumber the faculty 6-5) cannot be justified or condoned. However, it is not difficult to see how the students' temper was provoked by action of a quasi-judicial board which operating in a way seemingly so remote from the student body.
Tom Coffman
Political Tongue-in-Cheek
By Harry Ferguson United Press International
WASHINGTON—(UPI)—If you are rearing your boy to be a candidate for President of the United States, by all means start training him immediately to eat his own words. He also should practice the art of telling little white lies with a straight face and in a convincing voice.
Talking—or to be more accurate, double-talking—is an occupational disease suffered by almost all politicians. Inevitably, they say things that return to haunt them, and today we have a piece of bad news for the supporters of Henry Cabot Lodge. He is on record as having once said he couldn't be elected President.
It happened Sept. 4, 1951, in Paris where Lodge was trying to persuade Dwight D. Eisenhower to run for President. Eisenhower tells about it in his book "Mandate for Change": "Thinking to put him (Lodge) on the defensive at once, I asked: You are well known in politics; Why not run yourself? Without pause, his answer came back; 'Because I cannot be elected.'"
EISENHOWER, himself, got his feet tangleled in the sticky taffy of words. In 1952, while he was Supreme Commander of NATO, he issued this statement from Paris: "Under no circumstances will I ask relief from this assignment in order to seek nomination to political office." Two months later he did precisely what he said he would never do. He resigned as NATO commander and came home to run for President. Two words your son should eliminate from his vocabulary immediately are "never" and "forever."
Men running for President dwell in an unreal, twilight world where it frequently becomes necessary to ignore or deny the obvious. When President Johnson is questioned about his plans for the 1964 campaign, he says that the Democratic Convention is going to meet in August and nominate a candidate. Then he dismisses the subject and turns to such non-political activity as collaborating with eight-year-old Cathy May Baker of Park Forest, Ill., in keeping the railroads running.
IN THIS twilight world, the politicians talk in code. This is the way you translate statements about whether a man is going to run for President: Yes, of course, means yes (Nelson Rockefeller and Barry Goldwater). Maybe means yes (Richard Nixon and Lodge). No means yes but I want you to draft me (Gov. William Scranton). It would be naive to assume that Lodge, Nixon and Scranton are uninterested in the Republican nomination. They are like owners of race horses two days before the Kentucky Derby. They want to be
sure that the track is right and the weather favorable before they formally enter the race.
Your son should be taught to forget grievances, feuds and insults quickly. In politics Monday's enemy is Tuesday's pal and vice versa. The rival camps of John F. Kennedy and Lyndon B. Johnson had some harsh things to say about each other when they were fighting for the presidential nomination just before the 1960 Democratic Convention. Then sun pierced the clouds, and two men found hitherto unknown virtues in one another and away they marched together, campaigning in arms, to smite the Republicans.
IF YOU WANT the law of averages to run in favor of your son, there are rigid rules to be observed. Years ago, Sidney Hyman, an eminent historian, set forth the qualifications by which presidential candidates are measured. Despite an occasional exception they still are valid:
The man must be white. He should be a Protestant (Kennedy was the only exception.) He should have a record of some sort of public service, either civilian or military. The Governor of a state has an excellent chance. He should come from a heavily populated state and preferably one that is politically doubtful (this is a heavy millstone Goldwater is carrying). He shouldn't be too closely identified with any section of American life, such as labor or management. He should have the record of having had a happy family life across the years. This one is vital as Nelson Rockefeller is finding out day by day.
Is there anywhere in this broad land a man who has been mentioned either as a Presidential or Vice-Presidential possibility who has uttered an unequivocal no? Diligent research has turned up one—Sen. Joseph Clark, a Pennsylvania Democrat. He was told recently on a television show that he had been mentioned as a Vice-Presidential possibility and was asked to state his views.
"MY VIEWS," he said, "are that if nominated I would not run and if elected I would not serve."
That is known as "doing a Sherman" because it is what Gen. William Tecumseh Sherman told the Republicans in 1884 when they asked him to run for President.
Clark is a rare bird in the chirp, noisy aviary of politics. He violates all the rules by taking the floor frequently and denouncing his colleagues for the aimless, garrulous way in which they transact business. He does not share the belief of many Senators that they are members of the world's greatest deliberative body which enjoys a monopoly on wisdom and truth. He seems to think that too often they act like a gang of adult delinquents.
The People Say . . .
Labeled Satire
You have, I think, been ill-used. Your solution to a very pressing problem is, as far as it goes, a good one and certainly does not deserve the harsh criticism that it received. You are certainly right that the problem of campus morals is a serious one and deserves serious measures.
Open Letter to Mr. Franklin:
However I do not think you were wise in limiting the test just to girls who have come in after closing hours. The wanton girls who are of a mind can take their sinful pleasure at almost any time. Testing only the late-comer would catch only those who sin late at night and entirely miss those who sin earlier. I am afraid that you too have fallen under the popular misconception that the gate to the primrose path remains securely locked until the magic hour that is called closing.
If the problem of campus immorality is to be solved, then all girls must undergo a test to see if they have lost that which rightfully
belongs to their husbands. I would suggest frequent surprise virginity tests to be given in the dorms and houses much as bed checks are now made. Housemothers and counselors could be taught to administer the test. Failure to pass could mean only one thing—immediate expulsion.
There would be a few unjustly punished, but no price is too great to pay for us to be rid of the wanton women tempting unsuspecting young men away from the paths of pureness. Mr. Franklin, you are right, sex has no place on a college campus, we must fight to abolish it!
Prudishly yours,
Robert Jameson
Toppea graduate student P.S. To critics of my idea I would point out to you that this is what is known as SATIRE (remember your high school literature classes?). I had fun writing it and I hope you have fun reading it. Normally one doesn't label his work as satire, but the reception that unlabeled satire has received in the past in the UDK demands that this be labeled.
"I Was Just Telling Khrushchev, 'Our Differences Are Only Temporary'"
Theocratic Party, "In God We Trust"
By Dave Pomeroy
"It took the Republican Party 16 years to elect a President, but it will not take us that long," said Bishop William R. Rogers, Vice-Presidential candidate of the Theocratic Party.
Rogers is the running mate of Bishop Homer A. Tomlinson, Theocratic nominee for President.
Both candidates are bishops in the Church of God which was founded by Tomlinson's father in 1903. Tomlinson has headed the church as General Overseer since 1943.
The Theocratic Party was organized in the Church of God in Fulton, Mo., on June 2, 1960. Rogers is pastor of that church.
He said, "It is very possible for the Theocratic Party to be elected by a 'miracle' this very election. Our biggest trouble is getting on the ballots, but we will break through there soon I am sure."
"According to history, democracy has never lasted over two hundred years and it is always followed by theocracy. It is any time now for America to turn from democracy to theocracy without any trouble."
"The reason Bishop Tomlinson and I went there in November of 1960 to preach was that we had heard that you could not preach there, but no one bothered us and we preached on the streets for three days. We work by the power of God which men like Castro cannot touch." Rogers said.
Rogers was a minor league umpire before he entered the ministry in 1950 in Burlington, in his native North Carolina. He preached in Cuba with Tomlinson.
President Theodore Roosevelt appointed Tomlinson head of the military physical fitness program in 1917. Tomlinson rewrote the West Point Military Manual at the Army's request in 1919 and was General Eisenhower's roommate in World War I when both were captains. Tomlinson attended the University of Tennessee.
Presidential candidate Tomlinson, 71, is a pastor in Queens Village, N.Y. He "preaches in 22 different languages" and has preached in Russia and Cuba after Castro came to power.
The Theocratic Party advocates the union of church and state, but does not believe in a "forced" religion. Under the platform of the Theocratic Party, the United States would become "a holy nation under God."
The party also proposes a ten per cent titre for the church and nation which would replace taxes; elimination of racial discrimination; and unlimited production and free enterprise.
Reversal of the Supreme Court decision concerning school prayer would be sought by the Theocratic Party which would require Bible reading and prayer in all schools.
The nominees have spoken at several colleges. Bishop Rogers expressed a willingness to speak at KU should interest be that great.
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