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LANSVILLE
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND PRETEND TO BE MACHO IN FRONT OF OTHER GUYS WHEN I AM AROUND?
KEISHA, JUNIOR
Jessica: Because he's insecure and thinks that he has to act that way in order to prove something to his friends. It's the norm to embellish stories, talk about "chicks" and basically put on a machismo cover in order to socialize. Think about your girlfriends. Don't you tend to be a little more prissy and catty around them? Men and women are just socialized differently. However, if his machismo ever makes you feel disrespected, let him know. It's one thing to act like a meathead in front of the guys, but it's something else to disrespect your significant other.
Brian: I'm sure when you're around your friends, you don't treat him any differently, right? Wrong. You're overly lovey-dovey and want him to shower you with more attention when you are around your friends. Don't deny it. You want to show your friends how good of a guy you have, so you hug him, touch him and kiss him more; that way when (if) he reciprocates it, your friends see what they don't have. So essentially, he is just trying to show how many he is even though he has a girlfriend. Remember that you are just as bad as him. Deal with it.
HOW DO YOU AND YOUR PARTNER COPE WHEN ONE PERSON ISN'T SEXUALLY AROUSED AND THE OTHER ONE IS? — CHRIS. SOPHOMORE
Brian: This is a tough but it can be easily fixed. Putting on a guilt trip isn't going to make the situation better. Also remember that ignoring your partner and doing your business alone won't help things in the future. You need to keep your partner involved by gazing, seductively touching and whispering in the ear. Soon enough, they'll roll over and make you do some work on them.
Jessica: You're not in the mood, and he or she is rip-roar'in ready to go. You can't help but feel guilty and obligated to please. My advice is: Don't do it. By having consensual, yet unwanted, sex you're conveying a message to your partner that says you want to when you don't. You should always be honest or you'll end up doing damage. I recommend being direct and sensitive about it. I know you're so turned on right now, but I'm exhausted and I'd really just like to spoon." If he or she can't respect you, then you think about whether you should be with them. If your partner consistently declines physical intimacy, then discussion (not seduction) is in order. There may be something more going on, such as depression.
HOW DO YOU GO ABOUT BEING FRIENDS WITH SOMEONE WHO CHEATED ON YOU? — ALANA, SENIOR
Brian: You trusted and got betrayed. Don't go into a 'friendship' thinking they have become some great person. Let them be your friend solely in a fun light. The most in-depth information you should tell them is what your new favorite type of bear is if you really want to make him play, be as big of a cock block
as possible. Any time he tries to mack on a girl, tell her how he cheated on you. He deserves it if he treated you like shit.
Jessica: I recommend only entering into a friendship if three vital things are in order. 1 you were friends to begin with, 2 you were able to repair your trust in
the person and 3 you no longer,
have any romantic feelings
for him, if those three are met
and you really want to salvage,
a friendship from a broken
romance start by remembering
and zaring in on all the things
about that person that you like.
14> JAYPLAY 05.04.2006