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NOTICE RAINE AND RUIGH REVIEW NEWS YOU CAN USE HAWK TOPICS
23rd and Naismith (next to CopyCo.) 865-3803
SLOBODAN MILOSEVIC AND KIRBY PUCKETT DIE.
These two have more in common than you might think: Milosevic was once a promising young outfielder in the Detroit Tigers farm system, and Puckett had been a known proponent of ethnic cleansing in the Baltic region.
SPRING BREAK BEGINS TOMORROW.
Don't forget to pack sunscreen, a beach towel and some Valtrex for the herpes you'll contract from that "hot" guy with the tribal tattoo
2
DUBAI COMPANY RETRACTS OFFER TO BUY SIX U.S. PORTS.
Similarly, President Bush formally retracted his offer to act in the best interests of the nation.
BRANDON RUSH WINS BIG XII FRESHMAN OF THE YEAR.
Not unlike Derek Zoolander, Rush keeps racking up the accolades, despite an inability to go to the left.
K-STATE FIRES MEN'S
BASKETBALL COACH JIM
WOOLDRIDGE SEVEN
MINUTES AFTER HIS
TEAM'S SEASON ENDED.
Getting fired from K-State is comparable to getting rejected by a fat girl in a bar; it's a real sucker-punch to the gut of a man's self-esteem.
KU MEDIA RELATIONS ASSISTANT APPEARS ON "WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE?" More noteworthy, than one of our own appearing on the show is the fact that Who Wants to Be a Millionaire is still on the air.
"CSA: CONFEDERATE STATES OF AMERICA," A FILM BY KU PROFESSOR KEVIN WILMOTT, SEES ITS NATIONWIDE RELEASE. We haven't been this ashamed to be white since that time we hung out at The Hawk.
8
A MICROBURST HITS LAWRENCE EARLY SUNDAY CAUSING PROPERTY DAMAGE ALL OVER LAWRENCE.
While there have been no reports of people being magically transported to the land Oz, one local Phish fan says he saw "some unicorns and shit."
Matthew Sevcik
FORMER IRAIQ NUCLEAR CHIEF
VISITS KU.
Enough with all the "relevant" guests, KU. Invite someone here who students might actually want to see Cr.ristopher Walken, or Ken Griffey Jr., for example.
"MARCH MADNESS" BEGINS TODAY.
Buck Fradley, man. Buck Fradley. (And, for that matter, Duck Fuke. Those bastards always win.)
16> JAYPLAY 03.16.2006
45 - 41 -> 4.
X = 64 ^ {2} + 81 + 56 + 74 + 43