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KANSAS IN HEAT // SETTING THE MOOD
> Tackle the sticky world of relationships.
0. Twice I have brought this girl back to my place and both times nothing romantic has happened. We end up just talking and watching tosh.0. How do I spice it up and get things moving a bit quicker?
A. I think I know what you mean: You want some physical escalation of any kind that leads down the romantic/intimate lane. My first question for you is have you made any sort of move or advance that could be interpreted as romantic? If you are waiting for her to make the first move then you will be waiting forever.
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The majority of women worry about the connotations of making the first move, and want you to make it. This doesn't mean jump her bones, nor flat out asking her if you can kiss her (terrible idea). It means that you should verbally escalate the relationship by letting this gal know how you feel. Move a little closer on the couch and get confident about your words. It sounds like you are at the point of the dating process where you want this person to see you as a potential romantic suitor, so build up the romance.
Fix up your place. Make sure it looks clean and inviting. Try setting the mood and lighting some candles. I know that sounds cheesy, but it works. Take some pride on making your
Next time you are on your couch don't watch tosh.0 (although it is a great show). Don't watch anything. Build romance, put on some good tunes and let your friends Al, Barry, Prince, and Marvin help you out. You'd be amazed on how setting the right atmosphere will breed romance and intimacy.
If you really want to escalate things, invite her over for some chocolate taste testing. Everyone loves chocolate, which is an aphrodisiac. While you are both enjoying the mood, your chocolate, and maybe some strawberries, listen to some Sade. Sade is responsible for the conception of half of you that are reading this column. Putting on some Sade is like fishing with dynamite.
You may have noticed that nowhere have I mentioned alcohol. If you want to incorporate some wine or champagne, fine, but you really don't need it. Confidence is incredibly sexy. In the end, let this gal know your romantic intentions. Don't be afraid to put yourself out there. If you have gone on a few dates and things look good, you have nothing to worry about.
MIKE ANDERSON
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