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COMMENTARY: There's more to judge a book by than its cover. Bryan Dykman explores the ups and downs of a literary friendship.
WEDNESDAY,FEBRUARY 28,2007 WWW.KANSAN.COM
See Kansan.com for more opinions and Free for All comments
THE UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
OPINION
PAGE 9A
》 OUR VIEW
NCLB renewal needs revision
The Bush administration's much-heralded education reform bill, the No Child Left Behind Act, is due for evaluation and potential renewal in the upcoming federal budget. The ensuing policy discussion, arriving with decidedly less fanfare than the law's passage five years ago, will generate a chorus of cheers and jeers on both sides of the aisle as lawmakers seek an amenable bridge between opponents and proponents. Though areas of testing have improved in the past five years, the time to rethink our national education policy is long overdue.
It always seemed a bit peculiar that the party of limited government was so eager to impose federal testing standards on local districts, especially because that same party advocated the abolition of the Department of Education a mere decade ago. It is understandably difficult to force homogenized education policy on wildly different school districts around the country, and any revised policy should put control squarely back into state and regional hands.
To be sure, NCLB has noble goals and aims: to improve students' learning by increasing standards and allowing them to exit schools that don't meet improvement requirements. However, NCLB has three serious flaws. First, it punishes entire schools for the lagging performance of just one group within that school, then gives successful students little recourse for transfer. Second,
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it encourages teachers to focus on national tests at the expense of other material, creating a disturbingly intense spotlight on test performance. Third, it remains a grossly underfunded mandate; President Bush requested little more than half the required budget for 2006, an unfortunate trend that predates his administration.
Just a little bit of advice for Mario Chalmers: Learn how to tip your waitress, buddy. You looked cheap on right.
so why is the show so bad?
To start off, it has no originality. It's a bad imitation of "Saturday Night Lives" Weekend Update mixed with some visual and sound features of The Colbert Report. It features a segment in which the anchors take turns making short jokes about the past week's events while a picture related to the event shows up in the background. Even the anchors' attitude and facial expressions are reminiscent of Tina Fey and Jimmy Fallon.
Free for All, when you find somebody else's parking ticket just lying on the grass, what do you do with it? Do you burn it for them, or do you turn it in somewhere?
Some guy coughed on my macaroni at Mrs. E's! I hope he gets an
Natalie, you're not dating Sherron Collins. Stop lying to us!
S.
The purpose of a roundabout is pretty much defeated when you stop right in front of me to drop off your baby-mama.
Education policy remains an area that functions best when power is removed from highhanded national politicians and returned to local officials who know the districts and communities best. School districts vary by size, demographics, and tax base, among other factors, and uniform policy standards rarely take these differences into account. Any revised form of NCLB should focus on the importance of localities, and should refrain from identical national standards that force improvements but impede assistance.
The overarching problem of NCLB is that, like many federal programs, it imposes strict standards and harsh penalties, but provides scant resources for institutions that lag behind. This creates a paradox that would be comical if not for its adverse consequences on young students; a school has to meet standards to receive funding, but failure to meet standards costs the school the very funding it needs to improve.
so why is the show so bad?
To start off, it has no originality. It's a bad imitation of "Saturday Night Lives" Weekend Update mixed with some visual and sound features of The Colbert Report. It features a segment in which the anchors take turns making short jokes about the past week's events while a picture related to the event shows up in the background. Even the anchors' attitude and facial expressions are reminiscent of Tina Fey and Jimmy Fallon.
Why do the burglars on top of
McKay Stangler for the editorial board.
Eaton Hall always have to be black? Why can't we have a white
so why is the show so bad?
To start off, it has no originality. It's a bad imitation of "Saturday Night Lives" Weekend Update mixed with some visual and sound features of The Colbert Report. It features a segment in which the anchors take turns making short jokes about the past week's events while a picture related to the event shows up in the background. Even the anchors' attitude and facial expressions are reminiscent of Tina Fey and Jimmy Fallon.
To all the guys who run on campus without their shirts on: Don't shake your happy hand
so why is the show so bad?
To start off, it has no originality. It's a bad imitation of "Saturday Night Lives" Weekend Update mixed with some visual and sound features of The Colbert Report. It features a segment in which the anchors take turns making short jokes about the past week's events while a picture related to the event shows up in the background. Even the anchors' attitude and facial expressions are reminiscent of Tina Fey and Jimmy Fallon.
Free-for-All, you motorboatin' son of a bitch, you'd better lock it up.
To the person who called in about the Catholic ashes tradition: For goodness sakes, they're just palm
lock it u
Grant Snider/KANSAN
The Hawks defense is just like your best friend on your 21st birthday, just making you take nasty shots.
Jeff, you are a douchebag for wearing white in the front row at a basketball game.
The only thing Sherron Collins fears are dinosaurs. It's a good thing they're extinct!
WASH
Got milk?
so why is the show so bad?
To start off, it has no originality. It's a bad imitation of "Saturday Night Lives" Weekend Update mixed with some visual and sound features of The Colbert Report. It features a segment in which the anchors take turns making short jokes about the past week's events while a picture related to the event shows up in the background. Even the anchors' attitude and facial expressions are reminiscent of Tina Fey and Jimmy Fallon.
I think we should have an annual "Bonfire of the Uggs" every time the temperature gets above 50 degrees in the winter.
PAROCHIAL SCHOOL HOBBIES
COMMENTARY
Leave political satire to experts
American comedy has hit a new low. As if Carlos Mencia and the "Family Guy" weren't bad enough, there is now another awful comedy show; the "1/2 Hour News Hour". The show debated on the Fox News Channel two Sundays ago and, according to creator Joel Surnow, is supposed to be ""The Daily Show' for conservatives." Nevermind that "The Daily Show" isn't exactly liberal.
So why is the show so bad?
The first episode had a creepy, Twilight Zone style, introduction in which Limbaugh was president and Ann Coulter vice-president. If that wasn't bad enough, Coulter makes a joke saying that if you don't watch the show "we'll invade your countries, kill your leaders, and convert you to Christianity." The statement
Besides being facsimiles, the jokes aren't funny; they're personal attacks mixed with slapstick humor that involves either fart or prison rape jokes.
BY PATRICK LUIZ SULLIVAN
DE OLIVEIRA
KANSAN COLUMNIST
OPINION@KANSAN.COM
Successful political satire depends on smart commentary fueld by apt observation.
could be funny because of its absurdity, if only Coulter didn't actually believe it. It also doesn't make sense, if the show's objective is to be the conservative "Daily Show," why would they start by making fun of a conservative's idea?
The show is dull because it doesn't offer any clips of liberals acting absurdly, and there are several of those. Some of the best laughs in "The Daily Show" are from cleverly edited clips of politicians.
Speaking of laughs, it's painful to listen to the laughs in the "1/2 Hour News Hour." Either they hired people to stimulate the audience or have a laugh track. It's so artificial and obnoxious that it seems to bother the anchors.
The "The Daily Show" is successful because it rarely resorts to slapstick humor and is adept at satirizing politics. "The Daily Show"
doesn't personally attack conservatives; it criticizes the current political scenario. Successful political satire depends on smart commentary fueled by apt observation. Political satire is counter establishment by definition. It should resemble a smart-alcee teen talking back to inane parents.
So why is a comedy show playing on a news network? The Fox Broadcasting Program rejected the "1/2 News Hour", so it was relegated to Fox News. This shows how high Fox News' standards are, and how committed they are to serious journalism. It also further exposes their clear partisanship. And partisanship, as long as it's acknowledged, isn't necessarily a bad thing.
It is fitting, however, that Fox News now airs this show. The organization always resembled a comedy channel, whether it is Neil Cavato interviewing women wearing nothing but lingerie in his business show, or Bill O'Reilly ranting about the latest casualty in the "War on Christmas", there's always something to laugh at when watching Fox News. But the "1/2 Hour News Hour" isn't nearly as humorous as the channel's normal programming, and Fox News should leave political satire to the people who know how to do it: John Stewart and company.
Luiz Sullivan De Oliveira is a Belo Horizonte, Brazil sophomore in journalism and history.
Cherish literary friendships
BY BRYAN DYKMAN
COMMENTARY
BY BRYAN DYKMAN
KANSAN COLUMNIST
OPINION@KANSAN.COM
Going into a bookstore without a specific book in mind is a terrible thing. That's how "Chaucer After the Canterbury Tales" or "The Selected Letters of Emily Dickinson" makes it into your cart. I considered buying these two titles as I sat on a step in the poetry section awhile ago.
After a certain point, the titles all start to run together. I'm reminded that I already own most of the books I am browsing to. If I don't watch it, I'll be down $30 dollars and seven inches of bookshelf space for nothing.
I needed to get as far away from this bookstore as possible to avoid any unnecessary purchases. I pulled out my phone. I'd make a quick call and find someone I could hang out with. I barely made it through the As before I came to Angela.
Angela is a friend from high school who is currently attending college on the west coast. Unfortunately, last semester she felt lonely, disconfirmed and surrounded by students who were more concerned with their resume than their education.
I had only talked to her a few times since she left, and I wasn't helpful when she wanted to know what I thought about coming home from Pomona and pursuing college back in Kansas.
In high school, I had a book-filled relationship with Angela. We exchanged copies of "The Corrections" and "A Confederacy of Dunces." We both like "Jane Eyre," a rarity among high school teens. We went to see Chuck Palahniuk talk about his latest work "Haunted."
Now that she wasn't asking for a title recommendation, I couldn't come up with any advice for her college troubles. Our relationship, based in books, had a theoretical kind of depth that died when we left the world of metaphors.
I didn't know how to speak to Angela, but I was still in the bookstore while she was still looking for answers.
It was there in the fiction section that I decided on a weathered copy of "Don Quixote." I picked up another copy for myself. I thought back on the last couple of months. Maybe I've spent too much time in the drama section lately. A little epic would go a long way for me.
More than anything, I figured that somewhere in those 1,000 plus pages by an author who, according to the great Vladimir Nabakov, "stands for everything that is gentle, forlorn, pure, unselfish and galant" was the answer to what Angela should do.
I checked out and headed home.
It was 10 p.m., and the streets
were covered with ice. I had only
a few hours before Angela left for
California.
Dykman is a Westwood freshman in English.
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