FEATURE
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IT'S REALLY ABOUT BEING COMFORTABLE IN YOUR OWN SKIN. - ABOUT THE WAY YOU MAKE SOMEONE FEEL ABOUT YOU.
> Marni Kinrys, attraction coach
we respond to in only the first five seconds upon meeting someone. Ultimately, it's about the way you make someone feel about you. To make yourself more attractive, you must first engage in introspection, says Constance Dunn, author of Practical Glamour: Presenting Your Most Beautiful and Polished Self to the World. Think about any feedback you have received in the last year from your friends and family. "There might be something to the fact that four of your friends have told you that your habit of swearing loudly in public embarrasses them, or that you'd look fantastic if you dressed your fine figure in something other than a standard-issue uniform of scuffed Uggs and baggy sweatpants," Dunn says.
GET SOMEONE'S INTEREST
RelationshipexpertEdythe Denkin, a member of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy, says most women still wait to be approached by men. Young girls are taught that if a boy likes you, he will make the first move, Denkin says. But more and more women are becoming assertive and not waiting on the man to make the first move.
Dunn, author of Practical Glamour, says you must get a feel for someone by observing his or her behavior and actions before you make a move. If you want to make a connection, you need to find a way to interact in a way that's comfortable for you. Look into someone's eyes and think warm thoughts, Dunn says.
Alyssa, Overland Park senior, says if she wants to get to know a guy, she asks a lot of questions to find out what he's into. If he really wants to talk about sports, she will give her two cents on sports.
Anthony, a KU graduate from Los Angeles, says if he shares his opinion on something, he wants to hear her opinion too, even if it's not the same as his. "Disagreement sparks an entire conversation," Tony says. "If a girl is not afraid to share her opinion on something, that's sexy."
THE WINGMAN APPROACH
Sometimes a good approach to attract someone is to enlist the help of a friend, a wingman (or wing woman). The wingman is a coach, a quarterback and motivational creeper who helps his friend build confidence to initiate contact and conversation, says James Holeva, writer of The Wingman Chronicles blog. "The wingman, in many ways, is to creeping, what a talent agent is to a movie star," Holeva says. The wingman's job is to break the ice by striking up a conversation with a girl and her group of friends to get them interested.
A wingman can be helpful in getting the attention of a female. But a wing should play a supporting role, not the lead. The guy looking to meet someone needs to take responsibility for his actions and not leave it up to the wingman, says James Norton, co-owner of Professional Pickup, which provides dating and wingman services.
Norton says a wingman works best when a guy wings for a girl and vice versa. A female wing is a great help for a guy looking to meet girls. Female wings may feel more comfortable approaching girls for their guy friend than a male wingman would. Kris, Lawrence senior, says he had an experience with a female wing. The wing was a girl in his class who was trying
to help him attract the attention of another girl in their class with whom Kris was interested. Kris says he ended up going out for drinks with both of the girls.
DON'T FEAR REJECTION
Even if the wing does his or her job correctly, you're the one who has to make the move. But don't worry if it doesn't work out; rejection isn't that bad. Sometimes you may not get a good response. But you will get a better response than not approaching at all, or approaching half-heartedly. "It's about taking ownership of you and what you want," Kinrys, the attraction coach, says.
If you don't have confidence in yourself, you aren't giving anyone a chance to respond at all. Don't put too much time, effort and thought into one person. If someone doesn't respond the way you would like, simply move on to someone else. Dunn, author of Practical Glamour, says if you make an attempt to get someone's attention and he or she isn't taking your bait, you can at least move on knowing that you gave it your best shot. You haven't been rejected necessarily; you just haven't met your match. You can move on to someone who adores you for you, Dunn says.
Photo Illustration | Jerry Wang
Photo Illustration | Jerry Wang
Making the connection: Find ways to interact comfortably and positively. Showing warmth and happiness are attractive qualities to people.
MAKE A GOOD IMPRESSION
Marni Kinrys, who considers herself an attraction coach and a female friend to men, helps men pick up women and gives them tips on what she thinks women want. "Unlike a lot of other women, I actually know how to articulate," Kinrys says.
This ability to articulate helps Kinrys to help men figure out how to get what they want from women. Kinrys, a member of The Seduction Community who was named the world's best female pickup artist, coaches men with these tips to help pick up women.
$\textcircled{1}$ Be a man, not a boy:
Women don't always like bad boys or players. Women don't sit around with hopes of meeting an unreliable jerk who has no direction and plays games. Women want a man, not a boy. A man is a male who is self-assured, calm, cool, collected, comfortable and has the ability to lead. A genuine, authentic character will trump looks and bad-boy qualities in nearly every situation.
There is never a bad time to approach a woman. Women want to be approached, as long as it's by the right person. You could come up with a million reasons why a woman might not be interested, but you will never know for sure until you approach her. The only way to get what you want is by asking for it. Stop making excuses and just approach a woman.
$\textcircled{2}$ Make the first move:
3 Speak with character:
There is not one right pickup line to say to a woman. But there is a right way to speak to a woman. If you line up 10 men and have them say the same pickup line to a woman, will that woman be attracted to all 10 men? Probably not. She will be attracted to the man that said the line the right way. She'll notice the way he presents himself, his intentions and his character.
ica Janasz/KANSAN
day
+ 10x-6=27
Kansan writers win Hearst
Former staff members of The Kansan receive honors for their work on feature articles.
INDEX
Classifieds...11A
Crossword...4A
Cryptoquips...4A
Opinion...5A
Sports...12A
Sudoku...4A
All contents, unless stated otherwise,
© 2010 The University Daily Kansan
HEALTH
Watkins prepared to treat flu symptoms
BY IAN CUMMINGS icummings@kansan.com
Patricia Denning, chief of staff at Watkins Memorial Health Center, has a message for students who are feeling sick with symptoms of the flu; she and her staff are there to help, but they aren't handing out doctor's notes for getting out of class. Denning said such notes were not necessary unless the student missed three days of class.
"Sometimes we feel like we have appointments scheduled, not for medical reasons, but for documentation." Denning said.
Megan Hardy, a junior from Manhattan, made an appointment at Watkins to be examined for strep throat. Hardy said the staff provided her with a record of her appointment, which she delivered to her employer the next day.
Student Health Services' policy is that students can request documentation when two conditions have been met. One is that the student was treated at Watkins or has documentation of treatment elsewhere. The second condition is that he or she has been absent from school for three or more consecutive days because of illness or injury.
"They just printed it out." Hardy said. "And everything was fine."
Marta Caminero-Santangelo, chair of the English department, said her department follows the guidelines of the Office of the Provost. She said faculty has been advised against requiring doctor's notes since last year's arrival of the H1N1 virus.
WATKINS
MEMORIAL
HEALTH CENTER
To make an appointment:
785-864-9507
To ask questions, call:
Monday-Friday
8:30 a.m. - 4:30 p.m.
785-864-9583
Weekends
785-864-9500
Barbara Romzek, interim vice provost for academic affairs, sent a memo to university staff advising them to accommodate students missing class because of illness. The memo also said that faculty were not obligated to excuse students from class.
Denning said the flu arrived on campus Feb. 1, far later and less severe than usual.
Denning said students reporting to Watkins with flu symptoms would not necessarily be tested for influenza or be prescribed medication. She said the health center had been distributing relatively little Tamiflu, the preferred prescription drug for influenza.
"What we've seen looks quite mild?" Denning said.
Treatment is available for those requiring it, but the medical staff at Watkins is
SEE FLU ON PAGE 3A
TECHNOLOGY
Software developer creates new apps for regular phones
BY IAN CUMMINGS icummings@kansan.com
For those students who don't have a smartphone yet, don't worry
— there's an app for that. Some software developers are in the business of making apps for regular cellular phones.
David Valdiviezo, a sophomore from Mission Hills, likes Apple products but still carries a simple cellular phone.
"It's a lot cheaper," he said. "The plans for iPhones are too expensive. They're cool, but it's not worth the money."
Valdiviezo isn't alone. In March 2010, the Nielsen Company showed that up to 79 percent of U.S. consumers weren't using smartphones
phones that run third-party software such as apps and use the most advanced operating systems. Simpler models are known as feature phones. The Nielsen study projected that in 2011 the number of smartphones in use would equal and then surpass that of feature phones.
But that doesn't mean feature phone users don't have access to mobile Internet. App makers are designing their software to operate on all types of phones. Facebook, for example, just released an app free of data charges for feature phones, specifically for overseas markets.
Facebook worked with software developer Snaptu on its latest overseas app. Snaptu offers apps for Facebook, Twitter, Picasa and others that depend on Java software.
Paul Naphtali, a spokesperson for the company, said Snapu apps
SEE PHONES ON PAGE 3A