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WESCOE WIT > Lol.
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GUY: I was sober enough to hide his car keys, but drunk enough to forget where I put them.
GIRL: It got crazy last year. Naked people were jumping into this farmer's pond. It made headlines.
GIRL: I spent my second snow day untagging drunken photos from my first snow day.
PROFESSOR: It's still a language today.
GUY: Like... they speak it?
GIRL 1: We have some extra angel food cake if you want to come by and eat some.
GIRL 2: I would rather eat a gym sock.
GUY: Worst part besides the snow is that it looks like all those girls have dead animals hugging their feet.
GIRL: Uh, I have her boots.
GUY: I talk a lot! This stuff gets me fired up, so you might have to tell me to shut up sometimes.
PROFESSOR: Well, I might cross a line by doing that, so you'll just have to shut up from the get-go.
GIRL: We've got to hang out soon! I've been whoring myself out to all of my friends!
// SARAH CHAMP
AT&T sucks. They're worse than: Carolina panthers, L.A. Clippers, & Taylor swift's cover of "Last Christmas."
2:19 p.m., Dec 28th
CELEBRITWEETS // @JUDAHWORLDCHAMP
Judah Friedlander is an actor and comedian. He plays "The Hug Guy" in Dave Matthews Band's 2001 "Everyday" music video and Frank on NBC's 30 Rock.
My New Years resolution this year is to brush my teeth. 11.21 p.m. Dec 31st
At eastville comedy club tonight, both shows. I will discuss my upcoming run for president, or do lots of fart jokes, or both. 1:44 p.m.Jan 8th
watched lifetime movies all day.
5.22 p.m. Jan 13th
I'm going to go sledding before it snows to get a head start. 6:37 p.m. Jan 20th
I just found out that American Idol is a TV show where they discover singers. I'm slow on receiving entertainment news. 6:53 p.m. Jan 20th
Fuck it. I'm going for Polish food.
2.43 p.m. Jan 23
Built 5 snowmen today. Then karate kicked them all down.
10:32 a.m. Jan 27th
Going to LA tomorrow. I will teach a "How to Look Cool at the Beach" class.
5:32 p.m. Jan 28th
// TAKEN FROM TWITTER.COM BY SARAH CHAMP
Senior guard Marisha Brown and freshman guard Diana Moore celebrate after teammate Carolyn Davis hits the winning shot Wednesday night at Allen Fieldhouse. The Jayhawks took on fellow Big 12 team Iowa State. The game went into overtime and Kansas won 86-85.
WOMEN'S BASKETBALL REWIND PAGE 7A
SOFTBALL
Kansas softball team gears up for tournament
BY HANNAH WISE
hwise@kansan.com
Inches of snow and freezing temperatures don't generally comes to mind when thinking about softball season. But for the Kansas softball team, these elements became a harsh reality.
"We can't dive on it or else we will get torn up," said sophomore outfielder Maggie Hull. The ball reacts differently on the turf than it does on the grass or the dirt. When teams are playing outside, a ground ball might hop slightly to the left or the right depending on the condition of the field.
The weather has forced the team to practice indoors on the Ray Evans Football Field at the Anschutz Sports Pavillion. The facility allows the team to get batting practice in and hold full practices for the infield and outfield. However, practicing on the turf creates a number of obstacles for the players.
"We are ready to get out. At some point in time as a team you are done with practice and we are at that point. We are going to go out and work as hard as we can and there are some other schools that are in the same boat as we are." Smith said.
Even though the conditions are different, Coach Megan Smith is not going to let the indoor practices be an excuse for lack of effort.
The team's chance to escape the Kansas cold is finally here.
Kansas is heading to Jacksonville, Fla., to compete this weekend against the University of North Carolina, the University of Buffalo, Bethune-Cookman University and Jacksonville University.
"This first weekend is going to be a great chance for us to see everybody out in action," Smith said.
Smith said this year's team is very different than last year's team, even though it graduated only two infielders. The eight-member freshman class has stepped up to the challenge.
"We have a talented group of freshman. They are going to have their normal freshman ups and downs, but the talent is there and they are going to do a really great jot
A breakdown of the way this season's players will fill out the field
SEE
SOFTBALL
ON
PAGE 8A
8. Kansas State: Kansas State nearly won a bowl game last year, but loses its only offensive spark, running back Daniel Thomas, who ran for 1,585 yards and 19 touchdowns. Who will replace him? Will the quarterback play improve even a little? Coach Bill Snyder hasn't recruited anyone of note to replace Thomas' production.
9. Iowa State: I give the Cyclones the edge over Kansas here because of the schedule. Both teams have more holes than a block of swiss, but Iowa State gets to host the Jayhawks on Nov. 5, and that might be the tiebreaker in the conference standings.
7. Texas Tech: I liked the hire of coach Tommy Tubberville last year and I think he can continue to improve the Red Raiders. Without a quarterback, though, it's hard to see how good Tech can be in 2011.
spark an impressive six-game winning streak heading into the Cotton Bowl, which the Aggies dropped to LSU. Tannehill starting from day one will help this year, along with eight other returning offensive starters.
5. Texas: There is just too much talent in Austin to miss out on another bowl game. Coach Mack Brown landed the nation's fifth-best recruiting class according to ESPN, and the defense returns eight starters. Losing defensive coordinator Will Muschamp to Florida keeps me from putting the Longhorns any higher than fifth.
6. Baylor: Robert Griffin III is the quickback quarter no one outside of Big 12 country has heard of. Griffin accounted for 30 touchdowns in 2010, with 22 through the air and eight on the ground. The defense is still a question mark, however.
10. Kansas: Good things are happening for Turner Gill and the football program, it just might take another year to see those improvements. Gill and his staff landed a stellar recruiting class for a disastrous first season. As many as 16 of those freshman will play in 2011 according to Gill, which makes me wonder how much talent he didn't have in 2010. Expect growing pains from the large batch of first year players next season, but be excited for 2012.
.
Edited by Corey Thibodeaux