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home over a break. He admits he had no intentions of doing that when he saw her; he just wanted to meet up and talk since the two hadn't seen each other in a year.
"It's not like I wasn't having sex with my girlfriend at the time and I did it out of sexual frustration," he says. "I guess one reason why probably had to do with jealousy my girlfriend at the time was. She had pissed me off and annoyed me about talking to my ex already. She was so incapable of trusting that it provoked me."
Ben may have stumbled upon something pertinent in regards to cheating as a way of rebelling. Maryann Karinch, co-author of Date Decoder: Military Intelligence Techniques to Expose What He's Really Thinking, says cheating has less to do with attraction to someone else and more with the ego of the cheater. She points out romantic partners have to let go of their egos a little bit, but if a partner lets go of it too much he or she can be completely consumed by the relationship. "People are afraid of losing themselves and cheating is almost a defining thing that people do in order to express their own identity," she says.
So how can you make sure your partner won't
PEOPLE ARE AFRAID OF LOSING THEMSELVES AND CHEATING IS ALMOST A DEFINING THING THAT PEOPLE DO IN ORDER TO EXPRESS THEIR OWN IDENTITY
> Maryann Karnn, co-author of Date Decoder Military Intelligence Techniques to Expose What He's Really Thinking
rebel by way of cheating? Communication. The most important part of any relationship is to talk to one another. Karinch stresses the importance of partners talking to each other and setting parameters about what his or her definition of cheating is and making sure each partner is happy in the relationship and doesn't feel overwhelmed.
CHEATING WITH TECHNOLOGY
The Internet has greatly affected the way people cheat. The rapid speed and around-the-clock availability makes the Internet an enticing outlet. While some couples may not consider using the Internet to act on sexual desires, from viewing pornography to carrying out a sexually-driven conversation with
Photo Illustration | Travis Young
someone in a chat room, as cheating, others do. Karinch, the co-author of the Date Decoder, notes how the Internet makes a person feel as if he or she is in a different world apart from reality. "The Internet makes cheating feel more like a cartoon," she says. "You are jumping into this virtual world and you almost feel like it's not really you." Cheating on the Internet can
Virtual cheating: While some people are tempted to cheat in public, others find temptation on the Internet. But is online cheating really cheating?
be compared to role-playing games, like World of Warcraft or Second Life. Both are game specific to the Internet and require users to build and personalize an avatar. Karinch notes how some people who cheat on the Internet feel the same way as the people who play these games because both circumstances make a person feel as if they can do things they cannot do in real life. "People consider the Internet a target for cheating," Karinch says. "It doesn't feel like cheating because it's so surreal."
One of the biggest attractions to cheating on the Internet is ease. A recent survey of Canadian college students found that more than 87 percent of more than 2,500 participants admitted to using technology in order to engage in sexual acts. But not necessarily cheating. The tools these participants admitted to using include Web cams, text message and instant message. With such an overwhelming number of college students engaging in sexual acts via the Internet, one might think it would be easy to answer the age-old question: Is online sex cheating? Unfortunately, online sex is defined just as traditional cheating is, by each relationship. As couples make their own rules about what constitutes traditional cheating, they also make the rules regarding cheating and technology.
library expanison approved
The expansion will include the construction of a new parking lot and the addition of 100 public computers.
INDEX
Classifieds. 9A
Crossword. 4A
Cryptoquips. 4A
Opinion. 5A
Sports. 12A
Sudoku. 4A
Sunny
TODAY'S WEATHER
SATURDAY
SUNDAY
All contents, unless stated otherwise
© 2010 The University Daily Kansan
You Bakery, on Jan. 28. The owners said they hoped to fulfill students' and residents' desires for late night sweets after a late night on the town, while staying up to study or while staying in with friends. They said their goal was to have the cookies at their customers' doorsteps as fast as Jimmy John's does.
A VISIONARY,
A BUSINESSMAN AND
A BAKER
A BAKER
Rafferty, McCallough and Olsen said they put a lot of time and effort into making the company run smoothly.
Rafferty is the visionary. He came up with the idea for the bakery after seeing something similar succeed while he was at school in Colorado. He said he thought one in Lawrence could make money, too.
McCallough is the businessman.
"the best cookies ever."
"I decided to go ahead and make the recipes myself just because it would be better for our ingredients and our storage purposes," Olsen said. "This doesn't necessarily make a lot of sense unless you know exactly what is in our cookies, which is a secret."
While Lucky You Bakery has not been open long enough to determine how much it makes on an average night, business has tripled since opening weekend, said McColloch. So far, the owners have handed out a few flyers and have mainly relied on word of mouth, Facebook and Twitter to generate business.
"I ordered their cookies last Thursday with my friends and I have never had a better chocolate chip cookie," said Shannon Spurlock, a junior from Burlingame, Calif. "All of the cookies they serve are great. I would know because I ordered one of every kind to be sure I ate
were especially excited about what they had learned.
"It has been a cool lesson of interdependence to see how we all click together," McCollough said.
As for where they are headed, none of them really know. With brownies to join their menu soon, Rafferty hopes for expansion. He said some day they may even like to have a store front.
"We want it to grow." Rafferty said. "We want to continue perfecting what we do, but we don't know how large the market is. It's going to be a journey."
The cookies cost $6 for six or $12 for 13. Lucky You Bakery is open for delivery Thursdays from 7 p.m. to 1 a.m. and Friday and Saturday from 7 p.m. to 2 a.m. Customers can order online at luckyyoubakery.com or by calling (785) 865-1466.
Edited by Helen Mubarak
Aaron Harris/KANSAN
Above: Bailey Olsen, a senior from Overland Park, measures ingredients for a cookie mix. Olsen, Jack Rafferty, a senior from Shawnee, and Will McCullough, a 2008 alumus, opened Lucky You Bakery, a cookie delivery service, two weeks ago.
Top: Bailey Olsen, a senior from Overland Park, Will McCullough, a 2008 KU alum, and Jack Rafferty, a senior from Shawnee, own a local cookie delivery business called Lucky You Bakery.
The Suarez sisters work to uncover bones from an unknown dinosaur species found at a dig site in Utah. The twin sisters named this species Geminiraptor suarezarum.
CONTRIBUTED PHOTO
DINOSAUR
In 2004, twin KU graduates Celina and Marina Suarez discovered a new dinosaur species; now the species is officially named after them: geminiraptor suarez-
Species named after graduates
BY LISA ANDERSEN landersen@kansan.com
The 29-year-old geochem-
ists from San made the discovery while doing research at a separate site in Utah. The two began follow ing a layer of rock that strayed from the site. Marina wandered into a gully
SEE DINO ON PAGE 5A
paleontologists. The dinosaur was identified as a troodontid, a small two legged carnivore
where they saw bones sticking out from the rock.
After spotting limb and toe bones, the sisters came back the next morning with a group of
"I remember my sister saying 'Wow! Jackpot!'" Celina said. "We were pretty excited and knew we had found a significant site."
GOVERNMENT
School of Social Welfare faces cuts
BY CLAYTON ASHLEY cashley@kansan.com
The Bert Nash Community Mental Health Center in Lawrence is facing a state funding cut for the fifth year in a row, creating a potentially negative effect on the University of Kansas School of Social Welfare.
Dave Johnson, CEO of Bert Nash, was candid about his plans for the potential $372,000 cut.
"This particular cut we're going to fight as hard as we can," he said.
Govern. Sam Brownback's proposed 2011 budget calls for $15 million in
SEE BUDGET ON PAGE 5A