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Monday, November 1. 1993
OPINION UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN
VIEWPOINT
Speaker at graduation would enhance event
A prominent figure should speak at commencement this May. The KU administration must seriously consider the proposal that the Committee for Speakers at Commencement will be submitting.
The administration should not dictate what they believe to be proper pomp and circumstance and should not be apathetic or have predetermined ideas about the committee's proposal. Instead, the administration should listen to the students and student leaders who have expressed their support and offered their services to help the committee prepare its proposal. This positive and overwhelming support from students demonstrates the importance of the commencement speaker issue.
In recent years, the procession down the Hill has taken a long time. Graduating seniors have said that they do not feel they have anything to look forward to once they are inside Memorial Stadium. A keynote speaker would give students something to be excited about. Also, a prominent speaker would lend more dignity to the ceremony. Students will want to hear the speech, as a result, a sense of order will be maintained.
The University policy prohibiting the issuance of honorary degrees should be lifted. If it were, well-known speakers could be properly acknowledged for their appearance. If money is the issue, then sources can be found to finance the speaker.
The overall-student interest in the presence of a keynote speaker should be a clear message to the administration that students want to hear an original and inspiring speech rather than just the usual rhetoric.
MANNY LOPEZ FOR THE EDITORIAL BOARD
Congress should keep limit on jobless benefits
Congressional action to extend jobless benefits beyond the standard 26 weeks is an unnecessary step in the current recovering economy.
Since October 1991, the House and Senate have voted to extend benefits to those people who had been unable to find jobs after their original 26 weeks of jobless benefits ended. At the time, jobless claims were hovering around 400,000 claims per week. The number has stabilized around 350,000 per week since that time.
Ever since the original extension two years ago, Congress has passed legislation to extend the benefits. Earlier this year, though, Congress allowed the latest unemployment benefits to expire on Oct. 1. The House, with funding from anticipated savings in mandated changes in state jobless aid programs, passed a new bill on Oct. 15 costing an estimated $1.1 billion.
Last Wednesday, the Senate closed debate and passed the measure with one key difference from the House bill. Sen. Hank Brown, R-Colo., had an amendment approved that would forbid any extended jobless benefits going to citizens with taxable incomes over $120,000. This is causing a delay in the signing of the measure by President Clinton.
Hopefully, with this temporary delay, Congress will reconsider its decision to stop extendingjobless benefits. During severe economic times when job growth is extremely slow, it is necessary to extend the benefits so that those who are unemployed can continue to support themselves and their families. With the economy on an apparent upswing, the money that would have been used to extend benefits would be better used in reducing the deficit.
TOM GRELINGER FOR THE EDITORIAL BOARD
BESIDES THE BASKETBALL,THE MUSIC, AND THE DANCING, WHY WAS LATE NIGHT SO GREAT?
YOU DIDN'T NEED TICKETS!
A tale of a cow, brooms and a statue of Elvis
Lately a lot of media attention has been focused on the Mideast, so I felt that it would be a good idea to go out and personally review the situation in the Midwest. Here is my report:
I arrive in Champaign, Ill., and proceed to the University of Illinois agriculture school, which I am able to locate easily because I have clear directions, plus I can smell it. I am greeted by Dan Weber and Jean McAllister, two alert readers who wrote me a letter claiming that the university has cows with research portholes installed in their sides. Enclosed with the letter was a photograph of Dan with his right arm up to his shoulder inside a cow.
Dan and Jeana introduce me to George Fahey, professor of animal sciences, who informs me that the holes are installed because scientists are very interested in finding out what goes on inside the cow digestive system. (I already know what goes on Cows convert grass into cow poop But I'm not going to spoil the surprise for scientists.)
Fahey leads me to a cow named "Fussbudget," who is a very large, cud-chewing aircraft carrier. In Fussbudget's left side is a porthole with a rubber plug in it. Fahey tells me that Fussbudget doesn't mind the porthole, but I'm not so sure.
So Fussbudget has TWO reasons to want revenge.
"What gender is Fussbudget?" I ask.
"He used to be a boy," says Laura Bauer, a lab technician.
Now Bauer is removing Fussbudget's plug. And now she is REACHING INTO THE HOLE.
Bauer, pulling out some dark green material.
"You can see what he just ate," says
"Gack."Iremark.
But it's clear that these people expect me to put my hand inside the cow. Apparently this is a traditional agricultural gesture of hospitality. I put on a long plastic glove and approach Fussbudget, who is eying with a giant cow eyeball.
Squinting hard now, I stick my hand into the mass of dark-green glop. It feels, to use a scientific term, really yucky in there. Plus, I can smell methane. Fearing an explosion, I pull my arm out.
This is when Tom Nash, manager of the Beef Research Farm, tells me about an incident wherein a 4-H Club was checking out Fussbudget's interior, and Fussbudget coughed, and a young man standing in front of the porthole was covered with stomach contents.
I have the University of Illinois with a new appreciation of the benefits that agriculture will someday provide, especially in the field of interrogating captured spies. ("Tell us who your contact is! We have ways to make this cow cough."
"Ha ha! I say, backing away from the hole.
SATURDAY:
I am now in Arcola, Ill., to attend the annual Broom Corn Festival. Arcola boasts the world's largest rocking chair, the world's largest collection of brooms and brushes, and the world's only combination bowling alley and gourmet French restaurant. I am not making any of this up.
I am here to march in the Broom Corn Parade with Arcola's world-famous Lawn Rangers, a top precision lawn mower drill team. This is my third year as a Ranger. I've tried to talk my wife into going to the Broom Corn Festival with me, but she resists.
"It's just a bunch of guys who drink beer and push lawn mowers around and act juvenile," she says.
"Yes! I say, not understanding her point.
Anyway, the Rangers do more than just "push lawn mowers around." We carry brooms, and we perform precision broom-and-lawn-mower maneuvers. Plus, this year we are marching with — get ready — a 10-foot-high painted concrete statue of Elvis. It belongs to Clark and Sandy Stafford of Seneca, Ill, and is available for rent. It's mounted on a trailer, and it weighs 5,000 pounds, almost as much as the King himself near the end.
VERY EARLY SUNDAY MORNING:
After an evening of fellowship with the Lawn Rangers, I return to my room at the Arcola Inn, which is also where Elvis is staying. I reflect back on my trip — on Elvis, the Lawn Rangers and Fussbudget the cow.
Things are good here in the Midwest.
Weird, but good.
Dave Barry is a syndicated columnist with the Miami Herald.
LETTER TO THE EDITOR
Pregnancy article wrong; roles can be balanced
I should have realized during the interview for Carlos Tejada's "Tough choices await pregnant students at KU" that I was going to help fuel the myth of the debilitating state of pregnancy. He kept asking me about the difficulties that I was encountering balancing my roles as a graduate student, pregnant woman and GTA. I feel that Mr. Tejada's article painted me as some sort of victim; of what I cannot tell.
Mr. Tejada quoted me as saying that if my baby is born before finals then I won't take them, and I will feel my semester has been wasted. This is simply NOT TRUE! Tejada also stated that I had lamented that I could not drop out for academic and financial reasons. Why should I quit my job or drop out? The body's hormone and endorphin levels increase to give a pregnant woman a much-needed emotion and energy
boost after the not-so-pleasant first trimester. The female body also prepares itself for the inevitability of motherhood. I often wake up at night and grade papers or read for class because my body is not tired. This is thought to ready the expectant mother for nocturnal feedings.
I'd like to take this opportunity to dispel the myths of pregnancy and establish the facts of my situation:
My husband and I feel so lucky that we are having our son while we are in school. See you on the Hill on May 15, 1994. We will be the ones with the baby boy!
Little Rock, Ark., graduate student
Holly Larrison
Philadelphia will compete for the NBA championship
Predictions. Every fan has his or hers as the NBA season approaches. With the league now entering its first post-Jordan era, many people think that the throne of the NBA is wide open to a number of teams. However, most experts think that there are only four cities in the running for the title of world champion: New York, Charlotte, Phoenix and Seattle. But I contend that these analysts have grossly underestimated the City of Brotherly Love in their narrow selection of the league's elite teams. The Philadelphia 76ers, with the recent acquisition of Shawn Bradley and Clarence Weatherspoon, are now positioned to win their first championship since their dominant 1982-83 team.
LANCE HAMBY
Shawn Bradley, 7-foot-6 rookie center, is the foundation on which the Sixer organization is built. His immense talent level has prompted virtually every expert to admit that he is the next NBA great. Even the ever-critical Don Nelson, coach of the Golden State Warriors, said that Bradley would revolutionize the game of basketball.
Nelson's comments are understandable when both Bradley's physical and instinctive attributions are put into perspective. Bradley is the second tallest player in the NBA, and yet he has the defenses of a point guard. His shot blocking ability is second to none, and his natural instinct on knowing how to run the floor can only be compared to the legendary point guard Maurice Cheeks. Few NBA teams will be able to contain this combination of court knowledge and unprecedented talent levels interwined in a scrapy 7-foot-8 frame.
The main criticism of Bradley is that he lacks NBA experience. However, the Sixer's insightful owner, Harold Katz, foresaw Bradley's potential weakness and signed the future hall-of-famer Moses Malone to be Bradley's mentor. Malone's ability to control the inside paint has led him to six rebounding titles and to fourth place on the all-time scoring list. If Malone is able to pass on any of this expertise to Bradley, then virtually every past NBA record will be put into jeopardy.
Bradley is the new leader of a team that possess much young talent. Weatherspoon, a power forward, is the most unheralded young talent in the game today. His aggressive play coupled with his muscular body has led many analysts to compare him with the leagues best player, Charles Barkley. This forceful style perfectly compliments Bradley's graceful moves in the lane and will enable the Sixers to dominate the post position throughout the season.
Bradley and Weatherspoon are the two main ingredients of the Sixers national championship formula. Most experts believe that these two players will not be enough for a national championship, but the Sixers also have the best 3-point shooters in the league and a defense that led the league in shot blocks last year. With all of these factors combined, the only reasonable prediction for this year's NBA champion is the Philadelphia 76ers.
Lance Hamby is a Wichita Junior majoring in political science and Journalism.
KANSAN STAFF
KC TRAUER, Editor
COLUMNIST
JOE HARDER, CHRISTINE LAUE Managing editors
TOM EBLEN General manager, news adviser
BILL SKEET, Systems coordinator
Editors
Assistant to the editor ... J.R. Claiborne
News ... Stacy Friedman
Editorial ... Terrilyn McCormick
Campus ... Ben Grove
Sports ... Krisflet Fogler
Photo ... Klp Chin, Renee Kneeer
Features ... Erzola Wrale
Graphics ... John Paul Fogel
Business Staff
Business manager ... Ed Schager
Campus sales mgr ... Jennifer Perrier
Regional Sales mgr ... Jennifer Everson
National sales mgr ... Jennifer Evanson
Co-op sales mgr ... Blythe Focht
Production mgr ... Jennifer Blowey
Kate Burgess
Marketing director ... Shelly McConnell
Creative director ... Brian Fusco
Classified mgr.. Gretchen Kotterleinchl
AMY CASEY
Business manager
AMY STUMBO
Retail sales manager
JEANNE HINES
Sales and marketing adviser
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University of Mars
The year is 2340. Science of technology
have dramaticly
even drugs...are better. Witness 'the potency of just one "hit" from this marijuana cigarette.
by Joel Francke
This"buzz"will last just over three years.