6B
Wednesday, April 18, 1990 / University Daily Kansan
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Listen to Mother Nature. THE UNIVERSITY DAILY KANSAN Weather Ma
Gay and lesbian seniors gather in New York club
The Associated Press
Shirley Ringer, 65, remembers the day her family found out she was a lesbian. It was the summer of 1988, and she was on the Sally Jessy Raphael talk show on television, invited as a longtime SAGE board member. Her grandnephew was watching, calling his father and said, "You'll never believe . . ."
Arlene Kochman, 52, came out in 1985 when she came to SAGE as an outreach social worker. Previously she had been in charge of family treatment for the Israeli government, she said.
She said: "I got phone calls from members of my family the next day indicating, 'Listen, we saw the program, and we want to let you know we love you. The reason we're telling you is that we want you to be comfortable when you come to visit.'"
A financial manager whose lover of 29 years died in 1980, she said she joined SAGE a couple years later and found it to be non-threatening and like an extended family.
NEW YORK -- The men playing Scrabble at a card table in the drop-in center could be at any institution that serves the aged. But this is Greenwich Village. This is the Gay Community Center.
The rest is a happy memory for Ringer, who said she knew she was a lesbian since she was 21 but calls the TV show her coming-out party.
Just steps away from the room where angry young people in "Silence equals Death" T-shirts plan street rallys for AIDS financing is the headquarters of Senior Action in a Gay Environment, or SAGE. It gets older lesbians and gay men together for theater trips and socials.
For an annual spring dance that SAGE said attracted more than 600 women April 1, the organization rented a midnight clubtub that members could attend without being seen entering a gay establishment.
THE UNIVERSITY OF KANSAS Got the urge to go abroad? Want to see the world? STUDY ABROAD WITH KU! OPPORTUNITIES ARE STILL AVAILABLE AND IT'S NOT TOO LATE TO APPLY
But that's the easy part. In a decaying building that artists of greater and lesser fame have made fresh with sometimes erotic art, the SAGE staff works on reaching people who won't or can't come out of homosexuality's metaphorical closet.
"We're dealing with a population of people who've been closed most of their lives," Kochman said. "You have a group of people raised at a time when this was not good."
Volunteers in the "friendly visitors" program have to be discreet when seeing shut-ins, to the point of passing themselves off as cousins to avoid unwelcome exposure of a client's homosexuality.
The drop-in center opens on holidays because gay people unwelcome or uncomfortable at relatives' homes might be alone otherwise.
SAGE provides services typical of
a home护理 to the elderly, but there’s
always a twist.
The listing of SAGE with referral services and social service agencies requires lobbying. Five years ago, Kochman said, she sent 245 letters to agencies to offer SAGE's services and got only one response. And this was in New York.
volunteers at AIDS groups such as Gay Men's Health Crisis. And AIDS has given young and old gay people a common interest in political issues involving health care and disability.
STILL OPEN FOR APPLICATIONS
Kochman considers raising consciousness among her professional peers a major part of her job. Some misconceptions she has found among care givers are that only young people are gay, that homosexuality is something people outgrow or that elderly people are asexual.
A retired New York City school-teacher who sat down with a reporter at a Brooklyn coffee shop launched into a long tale of his Army service, detailing discrimination and subterfuge.
"We were tipping on eggshells," he said, after a new commanding officer announced, "We have a ring of queers at this base, and I'm going to get to the bottom of it."
GREAT BRITAIN EXCHANGE (several possibilities including Art and Design at Brighton Polytechnic)
Much has been written by and about the gay community as being a youth-oriented, looks-conscious subculture. But Kochman said young people liked seeing the elderly at the Gay Community Center or in gay pride parades as a reassuring symbol in the age of AIDS.
What kind of war stories do gay elders tell?
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"It is a very family kind of situation," Kochman said. Young volunteers enjoy hearing their elders' stories, and reminiscing is important in aging. Since it was harder in many ways to be gay years ago, they are kind of heroes and heroines, Kochman said.
She said SAGE persuaded a hospital to change an admissions form that had four categories: married, single, divorced or other. By including long-term partners on the form, gay seniors had a way to signal their care givers that they had a significant person who should be consulted and allowed to visit.
SAGE counts 4,000 members in the New York area. For some, contact is limited to paying the $35 yearly dues and getting a newsletter. About 1,000 receive services, partly financed by the government, Kochman said. And some of the members are among the agency's 250 volunteers.
SAGE has been active nationally only through staff members' speaking to conferences and members speaking out in the media. Some other cities have similar programs, but they are not affiliated with SAGE in New York, even if they use the same name, Kochman said.
- You may apply your scholarships and loans to your program fee.
- You will have a wonderful experience learning, travelling, and meeting other people.
"It represents that people in the gay world do age and get older," she said.
-You may study abroad your senior year.
SAGE counts 4,000 members in the New York area. For some, contact is limited to paying the $35 yearly dues and getting a newsletter. About 1,000 receive services, partly financed by the government. And some of the members are among the agency's 250 volunteers.
2. 8 GPA REQUIRED TO APPLY
-You will receive KU resident credit for your work abroad.
The fear of AIDS has made it harder for some would-be SAGE members to come out, said Kochman, now the organization's program director. But the disease has brought others out of the closet as
She recalled two women who lived together for 46 years in an apartment without telling anyone they were lovers. Neighbors thought they were sisters. After one died, the other joined SAGE.
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