Come 'n' get him, women, he's your ...
BOYFRIEND IN-A-BOX
Lawrence resident Cathy Hamilton has taken your dream man and turned him into a reality sort of.
Doctor Dave
Story by Dave Breitenstien
eeling lonely? Tired of your boyfriend treating you like crap?
If you're having trouble finding the
If you're having trouble finding the perfect man, one local entrepreneur has discovered the stallion you've been looking for.
you can find your man in Lawrence now. He is sitting at a local retail store waiting for you. Sure, he's not real, but does that matter?
He is 5 feet 10 inches tall, weighs 170 pounds, and his name is Dave. He graduated from Yale and is now a doctor earning $120,000 a year. Or maybe you'd like a firefighter? A musician? A cowboy?
Boyfriend in a-Box hit the shelves in Lawrence last week and Cathy Hamilton, Lawrence resident, is the brains behind the brawn.
"We were thinking about what we could invent, and we thought a prepackaged fantasy relationship would be perfect," she said. "If there's a universal reaction to this, it is that people will say, 'That would be a perfect gift for so-and-so.'"
Boyfriend in-a-Box has a suggested retail price of $14.95 and contains a 5-by-7 photograph and a wallet-size picture of one six men. Also included in the decorative box is a stat sheet, three phone messages, a card to attach to flowers and a greeting card.
Hamilton is the owner of Ms. Communications, a local business that began operating last month. Boyfriend in-a-Box is its only product.
Three of the six featured boyfriends live in Lawrence and will be signing autographs at Weavers, 901 Massachusetts St., between 2 and 4 p.m. tomorrow.
The idea behind the gift is for someone to pretend they have a boyfriend or husband and display one picture in a frame and carry another photo in a wallet.
but will this be a hot item with KU students? Zachary Kiefer, Overland Park
"It would probably be more popular in an office setting, where older women might do it as a joke," he said. "I can't imagine that it would do so well here."
sophomore. said no.
But Becky Hauenstein, Overland Park junior, said students would buy Bovfriend in-a-Box.
"I think the younger people would probably go for it more than the older crowd," she said. "I don't think I'd buy it, but it's kind of a funny idea."
Of the six potential boyfriends, Hauenstein said Doctor Dave was her favorite.
"He's a clean cut, nice-looking guy," she said.
Doctor Dave, whose real name is Ken Parsley, lives in Lawrence and is studying pediatric nursing at the KU Medical Center. He had never modeled before and said he was flattered when he heard comments like Hauenstein's. But the main reason he accepted the gig was because of the money.
"It was just before Christmas, and I needed the hundred bucks," he said. "I'm just doing it for fun."
Each of the models was paid $100, and Parsley said Hamilton contacted him while he was volunteering at a haunted house sponsored by the Lawrence Community Center.
"She kept looking at me, and I kept looking back at her," he said. "I had no idea about what it (Boyfriend in-a-Box) was at first or what it entailed."
"That's the worst question I get because it's so hard to find a girlfriend," he said. "School is the most important thing for me right now. I'm just taking this thing day by day."
While Parsley enjoys being the fictional boyfriend, he is not currently involved in a relationship.
Hamilton also heard from several sources about Jonathan Coachman, manager at Play It Again Sports, 1029 Massachusetts St. She went to the business and staked out her next subject: Athletic Al.
"I pretended like I was browsing through the store, but I was checking him out," she said.
Hamilton had few difficulties marketing the idea, and George Coakley, consultant with Strategi Coakley in California, agreed to help sell the product nationally. Coakley also was the marketing mastermind behind the first musical greeting card and the pet rock craze of the '70s.
"I think the comparison between all of them is with the originality," he said. "No one ever uttered the words 'pet rock' or 'boyfriend in-a-box' before."
Coakey said Boyfriend in-a-Box was not an attempt to fool people into thinking someone had a boyfriend. It also was not meant to be taken seriously, just like the motive behind the pet rock.
"People bought it for a laugh," he said.
"It was humor in a box. When it's on an office desk or in a dorm room, it starts up conversations."
He said Hamilton came to him with the
and his instincts led him to jump on it. He said products such as Boyfriend in-a-Box must have a catchy name, like the yo-yo, frisbee and Hula-Hoop.
"With marketing, the name is the game," he said. "There's a lot to say about a catchy name. Look at some of the most famous people now — Oprah Windefry, Whoopi Goldberg. If her name was Betty Smith, do you think she'd be as famous?"
Hamilton's innovation came from an experience on the internet. She was shocked at the number of singles meeting in chat rooms still searching for Mr.Right, and she expects brisk sales in the coming month.
"Valentine's Day is such a bummer for some people, so I hope Boyfriend in-aBox will be a good gift for people," she said.
Hamilton is a married mother of two,but she
went scouring local bars looking for the perfect pin-up. She went to the "best butt contest" at Coyote's, 1003 E. 23rd St., but came up empty-handed. While her research involved hours of hard work scoping out Lawrence hardbodies, her husband began to support her after hearing so many positive comments.
"It took him a while to get enthusiastic about it," she said. "He didn't really know if people would respond to it. Any time you risk a lot of money in an unproven idea, you worry a little bit. Throughout the whole thing, I never doubted that it would be successful."
Todd Brabender, public relations director for Ms. Communications, said he was impressed by the "Pet Rock of the '90s" and the quick start of the company.
"We expected business to be in jumps and skips, but it's been in leaps and hounds." he said.
bounds," he said.
YOU GET
ALL THIS ...
Cowboy Clint
OR
Corporate Craig
OR
Firefighter Frank
OR Musical Miles
AND
owner's manual
Athletic AI
AND greeting card
AND
phone messages
AND stat sheet
... AND
MORE!
Music reviews by Robert Mozdzylowsky
www.musicreview.com.uk/mozdylowski.edu
Tricky Pre-Millennium Tension (Island Records). When Tricky brings his cutting-edge hip-hop music to the Granada Monday night, those in attendance will be exposed not only to the hottest sounds in modern music but also to a new industry format.
Popular music magazines, as well as MTV
and mainstream radio, have begun to sound the death knel of "alternative rock," a once-underground genre that now has become mainstream during the last six years. Tricky, with his old-school hip-hop samples blended with dreamy vocals and modern guitar and strings, is at the center of this new electronic music explosion.
And since Tricky is less club-oriented than British phenoms Chemical Brothers and Orbital, he is fast becoming the U.S. music media's darling and the reluctant source of the "next big sound."
For that reason alone, music lovers should flock to Monday's show. But aside from being able to claim you saw Tricky before electronic music mastered the mainstream, this show also provides a chance to witness one of the most inventive musical minds around.
his week Bob takes a look at Tricky's fear of the new century; Arthur Dodge and his Horsefeathers hangs out with guests; the Bloodhound Gang amuses themselves; and Jamiroquai has a new album but isn't going anywhere.
Jeru the Damaja, whose hit single Ya Playin' Yourself is now climbing the rap charts, will open Monday's show at the Granada. Call for ticket information. Overall: 7.
Arthur Dodge and the Horsefeathers self-titled (Barber's Itch Records). When local independent label Barber's Itch Records released Topeka singer/songwriter Todd Newman's album, Temporary Setback, a new standard for the quality of a local record was established.
Now, with the Jan. 21 release of Arthur
Aside from Dodge being a playful, heartfelt songwriter, he also is the proud owner of the most whiskey-soaked voice in town.
When he added ex-Truck Stop Love singer and guitarist Matt Mozier to his Horsefeathers band, Dodge not only beefed up the guitar parts but also created some interesting vocal
self-sitted album, the label has raised the bar a little further.
And though the Horsefeathers are a tight unit, the album contains stellar guest appearances as well. David Williams plays exceptional pedal steel on Heartache and Dodge's duet, Chuck & Lila, with ex-L.A. Ramblers frontwoman Stephanie Turner could be the album's finest moment.
harmonies.
It will be interesting to see, however, how a record as country as this one does in Lawrence's decidedly rock-radio world. Hopefully, the
Lazer will latch onto the record's rockers like Curiosity Didn't Kill The Cat and leave the rest of the album's crossover country to KIHK.
If the radio doesn't latch onto this record, your best chance to hear it will be in the juke box at Louise's Downtown, 1009 Massachussetts St., which happens to be the band's
favorite watering hole. Overall: 8.
Bloodhound Gang One Fierce Beer Coaster (Geffen Records). We really shouldn't give this much ink to the Bloodhound Gang.
Sure, the band's hit single *Fire Water Burn* (you know, the one with the chorus "...burn mutha @#$%^, burn) is the coolest song in America's junior high schools. And yes, the band can claim a little do-it-yourself, indie rock credibility, since this new album originally was released on Republic
Records before being bought out by Geffen Records for nationwide distribution.
But that's all just a marketing smoke-screen. One listen to One Fierce Beer Coaster, and it is painfully
obvious that this band — along with sound-alike outfits Sugar Ray and the Phunk Junkeez — represents everything that is wrong with modern alternative rock.
The band's ridiculous mixture of metal guitar chords and clichéd hip-hop beats is enough to make hardcore fans of either genre puke. If the guys in Run D.M.C.
Blending musical styles and influences can make truly great music, provided it's done with a huge helping of ingenuity and musical ability. The Bloodhound Gang, though, has precious little of either. Overall: 2, which includes the bonus points for the album's perfect title.
could hear the Bloodhound Gang's Slayer- esque cover of their classic It's Tricky, they'd surely hunt the Bloodhound Gang down and kick their disrespectful little buts.
Jamiroquai *Traveling Without Moving* (The Work Group/Sony Music UK). Curious to know what the hottest record in the world is right now?
That's a shame, because Jamiroquai is far and away the best pure funk band active today. And while the band's third U.S.
Here's a hint: It's an extremely danceable, creative funk record by a talented band with countless live instruments — from the standard drums and bass to wind chimes and the Australian didjeredo — and the album absolutely never will be played on American radio or television.
release, *Traveling Without Moving*, simply contains more of the same smashing funk jams found on the band's earlier albums, the end result is no less than uplifting.
Play this record as a come-down from a wild party or a raucous night on the town, and watch your chances with that special someone improve ten-fold. Play it after a long day at work, and you'll be primed for dancing in a hurry.
The album's standout tracks include the instrumental Didjerama and the lead-off, Virtual Insanity, though the disc is best played on your player's random setting. Try it on shuffle in the five-disc changer with Prince's Purple Rain, Robert Cray's Repeat Offender and Curtis Mayfield's Right On For Darkness. Overall: 7.
The Critical Volume web site features sound samples, extended album reviews and artist interviews from more than 60 recording artists. Check out the site at www.kansan.com/critical